Take 2 roaches and call me later

I received a big reaction from what some are calling the “Roach Column”, and of course, all of it was from guys. There were a couple of fellows who had actually used roaches for fish bait, but most were like the guy to said, “Maybe you can catch fish with them, but I’m not about to use ‘em.” Vertis went “Yuck!” after reading it, and then said, “I wouldn’t eat a fish that ate a roach.” However, deep fat frying sanitized those roach eating fish, so we ate every one of them.

But maybe roaches have just gotten a bad name. I have read there are cultures in China and several other countries who deep fat fry roaches, and they are gobbled up like you would popcorn. The Chinese buy their roaches from roach farmers, who raise them by the millions, and they are used in several Chinese cities to eliminate garbage. After I read about Chinese cities using them to eat garbage, I realized El Dorado’s old garbage dump, which was working alive with roaches, was environmentally sound, since the roaches gobbled up tons of waste food, and extended the life of the dump.

There are an estimated 100 roach farms in China, and the largest turns out six billion roaches a year to be eaten, used in the manufacture of cosmetics, and medicine. Roach farming in China is growing because of the benefits they bring. But, since the biggest roach farm in China may have up to six billion cockroaches, it might make for a good horror movie. The escape of several billion roaches would be like a brown wave rolling over the countryside, and that would be a real scary movie. But the Chinese think of everything and one farm has a moat around it filled with fish and escaping roaches are gobbled up. The fish get larger, and the Chinese harvest them along with the roaches.

The Chinese also use a roach extract for growing hair and to treat intestinal disease. Li Bingcal, a Chinese roach farmer touts

them as a health food. “The greatest effect of roaches are that they have great immunity, which is why humans will absorb its benefits after eating them,”

Li said, noting that in China roaches are dubbed “Little Strong” because they can live for days even after being cut in half.

But there is more good news from the roach eating Chinese. They will point to some studies that say they cure many diseases. The Chinese are doing research using roach extract to see if it can cure cancer and AIDS since roaches have such a strong immune system. Wouldn’t it be a hoot if a disliked little insect led the way in curing cancer? Maybe looking ahead, considering all the new diet plans, we may come to a time when your doctor prescribes a diet heavy with roaches.

Mr. Chang, who is another Chinese roach farmer, estimates his roach farm sells several million roaches a year, some to a café down the road that has them on the menu. In fact, according to some western observers, who have actually eaten a roach, say they really don’t taste like chicken, but they are pretty tasty, and as you bite down there is a crunch like you were eating celery, then a sweet taste, which probably would take some getting used too. I would imagine that it wouldn’t be that hard, if you understood Chinese, you could probably find to find a recipe called roaches in dipping sauce.

The Chinese say roaches are a good source of protein, and with the earth’s population continuing to grow, we are probably going to need every source of protein we can come up with. Who knows, maybe eating roaches is something like getting used to eating crawfish. If we would just think of roaches as just another source of protein, as the Chinese do, then the thought of crunching down on a big, fat one wouldn’t be any different than sucking a crawfish head. I can remember catching crawfish for fish bait, but the idea that I would boil one, peal the tail, dip it in sauce, and eat it never crossed my mind. But some folks, actually one of our neighbors, who spent way too much time in Louisiana, loves to suck crawfish heads. How far is that from eating roaches? Well that makes me say “yuck”. Or how about eating snails? I know you don’t eat the snails raw, but you do eat raw oysters. The first man to eat a raw oyster had to be really hungry.

I’m thinking maybe roaches are getting a bad rap. Take crickets for instance. They are bugs just like roaches with six legs, and they really aren’t that much different from a roach. Maybe if Walt Disney had created Jimmie Roach instead of Jimmie Cricket, we would have a different opinion about roaches. As the little roaches marched across a kitchen cabinet singing “Hi ho, hi, ho, it’s off to work we go,” dressed in little pink suits with top hats, standing on two of their six legs twirling a cane, you would be smiling and enjoying the show.

I’ll admit roaches have a bad name, but if we just think about it for a minute, roaches are really little vacuum cleaners who clean up a messy kitchen. That’s right. You make a late night peanut butter sandwich and drop some crumbs on the floor, and presto, while you are sleeping those little vacuum cleaners come roaring out from under your refrigerator and gobble up every crumb.

Of course, you’re probably thinking roaches carry every dread disease known to man, but they don’t. In fact, roaches can’t be tagged with any diseases. Yes, it’s really interesting to note how just the sight of a single roach scampering across a dirty kitchen floor will make you put down your cigarette and call the exterminator. I’m not sure if spraying a chemical around every baseboard in your house just to kill roaches is a good idea. We have stopped the spraying, but even if roaches are good fish bait and harmless, I don’t want them camping out in our house. We use glue traps that pick off spiders as well as roaches. They go in but they don’t come out.

Well, just think of the numerous items of Chinese origin we embrace today. Who would have thought we would allow tiny needles be inserted into our bodies, but today we routinely use acupuncture. The Chinese also serve up a lot of raw fish, eels, octopus, and an occasional young dog. In China a “hot dog” on a menu can have a whole different meaning.

There is big money in Chinese roach farming where roaches sell for between $15 and $20 per pound. If back when Buddy and I could have caught thousands of roaches at the El Dorado Garbage Dump, we’d be rich…. if we could have figured out a way to ship roaches to China.

There are dozens of roach species, but the most preferred one for roach farming is the American roach. Just think, we have the most desirable roaches in the world!

Richard Mason is a registered professional geologist, downtown developer, former chairman of the Department of Environmental Quality Board of Commissioners, past president of the Arkansas Wildlife Federation, and syndicated columnist. Email richard@ gibraltarenergy.com.