El Dorado News-Times

Which songs make you cry?

- Danny Tyree Danny welcomes email responses at tyreetyrad­es@aol. com and visits to his Facebook fan page “Tyree’s Tyrades.”

“Late at night when it’s hard to rest/I hold your picture to my chest/ and I feel fine, I feel fine/ But it’s a rainy night in Georgia…” – written by Tony Joe White and performed by Brook Benton.

I need your input. I know this is a terribly personal question, but which songs make you cry? And why? (And would you be miffed if you suddenly, inexplicab­ly started receiving spam emails for Kleenex and Visine?)

I could name a dozen or more songs that reliably put ME on a spectrum of emotional reaction from “misty-eyed” to “weepy” to “bawling” to “No, hold off with the Jaws of Life until I hear what happened to poor little Teddy Bear …”

(Those manipulati­ve so-and-sos behind TV’s “This Is Us” added “You Are My Sunshine” to the mix a while back, darn it.)

I can share such potentiall­y embarrassi­ng informatio­n with you because we’re all friends here, because the macho “Big boys don’t cry” mantra was always a bunch of hooey anyway and because if

I DON’T hurry up and write SOMETHING, the paper will probably fill this space with “Family Circus” rejects. (“Who left little dotted lines all over a columnist’s career?” “Not Me!” “Ida Know!”)

You would think that a person would swap out painful songs instead of accumulati­ng them over a lifetime, but whoever said “Time heals all wounds” was WRONG. Time doesn’t heal all wounds; it accidental­ly sews a surgical sponge inside of you before hitting you with an unexpected out-of-network bill!

Certain songs should carry TRIGGER WARNINGS, as they dredge up poignant memories of unrequited love, deceased pets, faraway homes and shattered dreams. Who am I kidding? I’d probably ignore the warnings. I would masochisti­cally insist on a little of “the hair of the dog that bit him” (especially if the dog wound up shot because of rabies).

WHY do I deliberate­ly subject myself to a barrage of time-tested tear-jerkers on YouTube or my MP3 player? Well, sometimes I just need a CATHARSIS.

Granted, fellows who say things like “Sometimes I just need a catharsis” are the ones who EXPERIENCE unrequited love more than guys who say, “Sometimes I just need a joint; can I get you one while I’m up?”

My 29th wedding anniversar­y is fast approachin­g, but “Leaving On A Jet Plane” still delivers retroactiv­e stress related to my long-distance courtship of my wife. “Watching Scotty Grow” is a joyful song, but I get choked up because our son is growing up too fast.

One of the “songs” that is most gut-wrenching for me is actually a recitation: Walter Brennan’s 1962 rendition of “Old Rivers” (written by Cliff Crofford). If you’re not familiar with it, the narrator reminisces about a poor, hardworkin­g neighbor he traipsed along behind as a youngster. Old Rivers is quoted as promising, “One of these days I’m gonna climb that mountain/ Walk up there among the clouds/Where the cotton’s high and the corn’s a-growin’/And there ain’t no fields to plow.”

“Old Rivers” resonates because it makes me appreciate the hardscrabb­le existence endured by my parents, grandparen­ts, aunts and uncles during the Great Depression. Of course, it also resonates because I have to get up off the sofa and find the remote so I can watch Walter Brennan in high-definition reruns of “The Real McCoys.” *Sigh*

Seriously, turn on the waterworks and send me those comments.

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