The pleasures of life

As Americans, I think we have a tendency to rate enjoyment by how much it costs, when in reality cost has very little to do with the sensory feeling that comes from engaging in a pleasurable activity.

If the more money a pleasurable activity costs always made it more pleasurable, then only the richest individuals would be able to lead the most pleasurable lives. But obviously that’s not true, because as I look back on my life at the times I felt some of the highest amount of pleasure, the costs of those experiences were minimal or free.

Do you really believe paying $250,000 to be blasted into orbit around the Earth gives a person a more pleasurable experience than when I watched my 7 year old granddaughter pull in a two pound bass from our backyard pond?

Of course not.

We all have memories that stick with us, and if the cost of the experiences meant the more it cost was the only factor, then I guess, when our family took the Concord from London to New York that should rack up there with one of our most pleasurable experience… but it wasn’t. Oh, it was interesting, but after an hour or so it was just another plane ride… but a lot more expensive.

I have more warm, pleasurable thoughts as I think about paddling up Champagnolle Creek in an old wooden boat, which I rented for $2.00, easing along, fishing as I paddle between huge cypress trees, smiling as I watch a couple of wood ducks take wing. Or the pleasure I felt after a morning of trying to teach my son to ride a bike, and then finally… ” Vertis! … Look, there he goes!” You can’t create that pleasure with money.

But while doing something small and without much cost is important for personal enjoyment, another way to have a pleasurable experience is doing for others. We can all recall the gift or good deed we did to someone else which gave us pleasure because it gave them pleasure. Sometimes the most expensive Christmas presents elicit barely a yawn, when a gift that cost a fraction of that cost brings the receiver of the gift great pleasure, and the giver shares that joy. When our daughter was 10 we gave her an inexpensive rabbit fur jacket, and she was so happy, she cried. How much is that pleasurable moment worth? Yes, it’s priceless.

Or just this morning, with 10+ inches of snow on the ground where I couldn’t even get my big heavy Navigator off the turnaround where we could go to the store… actually, I had gone to work on Tuesday and Wednesday, but the second punch of sleet and snow shut me completely down. After my two cups of coffee, I looked outside on our snow and ice covered deck, where I had put birdseed the day before. The birds had cleaned up every scrap, and the birds were everywhere, but the little birdseed that was left over from the day before was under several inches of new ice and sleet. There wasn’t any way I could get to the store, so Vertis and I cleaned out the cabinet and with old bread, some cooked rice from last night’s dinner, we came up with a large Tupperware container full of homemade birdseed. The birds loved it, and as they flocked to have breakfast, we smiled. Doing for others, even if they are birds, always brings pleasure.

I think all of us can think back on dozens of little giving incidents that have given us pleasure. It’s just part of life, and life is not what some cynical individuals have mouthed: “When you die, the person with the most toys wins.”

I guess living a pleasurable life can be just being there and responding.

Back when we were living in Portland, Texas, a bedroom community of Corpus Christi, we took a direct hit from a hurricane named Celia. The eye of the storm came right over Portland, and it was 20 minutes of dead clam from 180 MPH wind followed by another blast of 180 MPH wind coming from the opposite direction. Our subdivision was right on Corpus Christi Bay, and we took the full force of the wind. Insurance companies, in surveying the damage, said over 30% of the homes in Portland had a 100% damage claim. We were in the middle of a north-south street in a one story house with a two story houses on both side of us. Both of those houses suffered catastrophic losses, losing their entire roofs. We had almost no damage.

That night, 22 people spent the night in our house, and we welcomed them in. I look back on that experience, where we opened our home to our neighbors who had lost their homes, with a warm feeling, because we were there when a need arose, and we responded. Yes, if helping your neighbors who are in need doesn’t give you pleasure, you need to reset your pleasure button.

Sometimes we must realize that what gives each of us pleasure can be radically different, even from someone who we are very close to, and when we acquiesce to that person’s desires to give them pleasure, it is almost like directly having the pleasure ourselves. Just consider this: if your significant other enjoys something that you barely tolerate, and if you really have unselfishly

love for that person, when they have pleasure, then you will share in the pleasure.

This morning, as I was writing this column, Vertis had the TV on and the interviewer had Mattress Mack from Houston on the show. Mattress Mack, who owns two large furniture stores in the city, has a reputation for opening his stores during catastrophic events to all needy people, and when these last two winter storms crippled the utilities, and people in Houston were cold and in the dark, he opened his stores to over three hundred people. But what was remarkable about the interview was the expression on Mattress Matt’s face. He was as happy about sharing his stores with needy neighbors as if he had just won the lottery.

So if we really look back at our lives, it’s easy to recall the many pleasures that were free or very low cost, which stand out from the others, and when you mix them with the pleasure you received by doing or helping others, it’s not hard to summarize how to live the most pleasurable life possible.

Yes, if we will add to the small bits of life, which cost very little, and to that mix a helping hand to your neighbor in need and enjoy the pleasures your lover enjoys, we will live a full life with abundant pleasures.

Richard Mason is a registered professional geologist, downtown developer, former chairman of the Department of Environmental Quality Board of Commissioners, past president of the Arkansas Wildlife Federation, and syndicated columnist. Email richard@gibraltarenergy.com.