WEIGHING THE OPTIONS

An owner’s search for ways to keep her “suddenly single” mare from becoming lonely leads to a surprising realization.

never planned on owning an “only” horse. My husband and I always envisioned keeping two horses on our small farm and for a long time we did; for a while, we even owned three.

But my daughter outgrew her pony so we found him another home. Then my old gelding passed away. As I struggled to cope with his loss, I worried about how my mare, Sally, would react to being alone. After all, everything I knew about horses told me that she needed the company of at least one other horse to feel safe and happy. I started to think about hurrying up and repopulating my herd to protect her emotional well-being.

But I couldn’t help but notice that Sally seemed to be doing just fine. In truth, she had always seemed a bit ambivalent toward my gelding. She wasn’t hostile but didn’t seem very attached to him either. On the other hand, Sally had bonded with our pony. She would forlornly call out to him if I rode her out on the trails alone, and when we returned she acted like she was being reunited with a long-lost friend. Yet when the pony was sold and left for good, Sally took it in stride, giving no indication that she missed her friend.

And now that she was alone, Sally didn’t seem to care.

Nonetheless, I worried that she would eventually become lonely, and set about the process of figuring out what was best for her. Sure, I could get another horse---and several kind friends had offered to lend me one---but I wasn’t ready to take that step, especially with any haste. I was still grieving the loss of my gelding, and I didn’t want to make the financial and emotional commitment to another horse without thinking it through. But would I be letting Sally down if I left her on her own?

In exploring my options, I discovered that there were many ways I could keep Sally happy without actually bringing in another horse. I decided to consider each one in the context of her needs and personality, as well as my own situation and resources. Through that process, I hoped, I’d hit on the right solution for both of us. Here are the main options I considered.

• Spend more time at the barn. Maybe, I thought, I could replace the companionship Sally might be missing, as well as occupy her free time, by spending more time with her myself.