Elim­i­nate “I must”

First For Women - - Insight -

“Chal­lenge the un­rea­son­able be­lief, I must be avail­able 24/7 for my friend,” ad­vises Burn. “Say to your­self, Re­ally? Is that what it means to be a good friend? Aren’t there other ways?” The ex­treme thought driv­ing your be­hav­ior locks you into a sense of im­pos­si­ble obli­ga­tion, but ques­tion­ing it cre­ates space to ex­plore other ways of help­ing, like send­ing a card re­mind­ing her she’s loved. Says Burn, “It’s not self­ish to have ap­pro­pri­ate bound­aries.”

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