Calculate the cost of pleasing

To fight the urge to acquiesce, ask yourself, Is her disapproval so unbearable that I must sacrifice myself to reduce the possibility she’ll be mad? You may worry your neighbor will be hurt, but weighing that against the toll of more favors reveals the price you pay to please. “People accept boundaries if they’re delivered simply,” says Burn. So it works best to plainly say, “No, I can’t cat-sit.” “Even when people are miffed, they get over it almost always. You can be a good person and still say no; others can handle it.”