BE HAPPY & ENERGIZED with these proven strategies
Experts offer simple strategies for bringing more bliss into your life
Hot sand beneath your feet. The slap of canoe paddles on a quiet river. Pinwheels spinning in the breeze on a summer afternoon… Immersing yourself in the sensory details of fond summer memories is a research-backed strategy for boosting your mood. But in the stressful whirl of a typical day, getting lost in a lovely moment—past or present—can seem downright laughable.
“The word ‘joy’ trips people up because it connotes buoyancy and cartwheels and having a smiley smile all the time—but life can be hard,” admits James Baraz, coauthor of Awakening Joy. “True happiness is a deeper quality that comes from embracing whatever’s going on right where you are, both the ups and downs.”
So if inborn optimism and perfect circumstances aren’t required for happiness, what’s really getting in the way? “Often it’s beliefs like, I don’t deserve joy or It’s dangerous to feel too happy because the other shoe is going to drop,” observes Baraz. “You might also think, It’s selfish to put my own well-being at the center of my life—not realizing that it’s the best gift to everybody around you.”
The feel-good bottom line? “Happiness is not a magical, unattainable destination. It’s a practice,” affirms Baraz. “From this perspective, everything that happens becomes an opportunity to practice meeting life with an open heart.”
Here, experts share their best strategies for channeling delight, energy and bliss—right now!
JOY BOOSTER
INVITE SURPRISE
You put a lot of thought into planning a fun trip, but you can’t get out of your head and actually enjoy it. “Humans regularly feel the push and pull of several opposing needs: the need for safety versus adventure, comfort versus challenge, certainty versus wonder,” says Tania Luna, coauthor of Surprise: Embrace the Unpredictable and Engineer the Unexpected. “You feel most alive when things are uncertain, but the need for control and comfort often win out because they’re less threatening.”
To inject more joy into your experience, Luna suggests playing a simple game, whether you’re exploring a new vacation spot or returning to a place you’ve visited a lot: “Toss a coin at every turn to decide if you’ll go left or right. Keep walking and coin-tossing until you spot something surprising.” Why it works: “When you start to look at every day, every place and every person as a delightful surprise waiting to happen, it’s like all the colors around you get brighter. You start to feel curiosity and wonder on a regular basis, which are the best antidotes to stress.”
JOY BOOSTER
PRIORITIZE POSITIVITY
After yet another week of attending back-to-back meetings, battling traffic and racing through errands only to get home and pick up after everyone, you feel a rush of resentment: I don’t even have a summer! “Your frustration makes perfect sense: Life can be exhausting, and you’ve got this really valid desire to just relax a little bit,” says Rachel Hershenberg, Ph.D., a psychologist at Emory University and author of Activating Happiness. “You want to take it off hyperdrive, but you feel like you can’t.”
The fix? “Within the confines of your day-to-day reality, schedule little creative ways to honor your tired body and give yourself a bit more of what you need,” advises Hershenberg. For example, she says you might listen to your favorite playlist instead of the news while commuting. Or allow yourself to skip chores one night and kick back with your family. “These small actions communicate, I’m taking care of myself and I deserve it.”
JOY BOOSTER
BREAK THE RULES
Your first thought when the ice cream truck stops on your block? Calories. When your spouse wants to watch one more episode of your favorite Netflix series? Bedtime. When a pal invites you for pedicures? Budget. And if you do get a treat yourself, you can’t fully revel in the experience. “This tendency is both a strength and a challenge,” says Hershenberg. “It probably serves you really well at work and helps you maintain a healthy lifestyle, yet at the same time it can be hard to turn off.”
Does it, in fact, turn off? Yes, says Hershenberg: “Ask yourself, Is this a time it’s worth letting loose? Then think about the values you might be tapping into.” Maybe spending the extra hour with your husband aligns with your value of quality family time, or allowing for the occasional indulgence supports your value of balance. “There’s nothing wrong with saying no,” says Hershenberg. “But taking a step back and looking at what’s motivating your decision gives you a chance to be a little more intentional about what you do and what might feel good for you.”