Paying lip service

“When we adopted our dog, Jake, as a puppy, our cat, Zoey, also adopted him as her own. Jake happily follows Zoey everywhere she goes, and the two play together, sleep together and even eat meals side by side. They are such a comedic pair that my husband took to calling them Laurel and Hardy— especially apt as Jake became chubbier the older he got.

“Anyone we have over to the house always comments on what a cute duo our cuddly pals are.

One day, we had my new boss, Malcolm, and his wife, Lisa, over for dinner. Wanting to impress them, I worked hard to make the meal extra special. All was going well until right before dessert, in waddled Jake, looking like a canine circus clown with his face covered in pink lipstick. We all stared at him aghast, and with horror, I realized that the shade perfectly matched the lipcolor Lisa was wearing.

“I hurriedly excused myself and headed to the living room, where I’d seen Lisa place her purse on an end table. There, I spied Zoey sitting next to the purse, which was now lying on its side, its contents scattered on the floor. Zoey had obviously knocked it over and Jake had chowed on the lipstick—and a few other select personal items.

“I brought the destroyed tube back to Lisa, apologized profusely and insisted on replacing it. It was a very expensive brand, so I told Jake and his feline partner in crime the money was coming out of their treat budget!”

—Jessica Good, 52, Houston