‘Let families back in’
Rally in town calls for expanding family visits at nursing homes
GREENWICH — Jenny Larkin stood in her yard filled with signs saying “Isolation kills, too,” and shared the personal story of the her mother’s final days at the Nathaniel Witherell in Greenwich.
Her mother, a former Broadway actress, had lost the ability to speak after a stroke but was happy at the Witherell until the COVID-19 pandemic hit. That restricted family visits and cut her off from friends and loved ones inside the town-owned short-term rehab and skilled nursing center.
“My mother started having really bad days,” Larkin said during a rally Monday calling for expanded visits at the state’s nursing homes.
“I noticed she was missing her glasses and had lost a tooth,” Larkin said, saying she could see the toll of the isolation on her mother, both physically and mentally.
“At mom’s last care meeting, I learned the antidepressants they were giving her
weren’t working and was asked if they should raise her dose,” she said. “But I read that antidepressants were for clinical depression, not for seniors suffering from failure to thrive due to loneliness and isolation. I insisted she was unhappy due to the isolation and from not being able to see her family.”
Her mother’s condition declined, Larkin said, describing their last limited visit in an outdoor “pod” last month. She “looked horrible,” couldn’t sit up and couldn’t keep open her sagging, red eyelids, Larkin said.
Communicating through motions and facial expressions, her mother conveyed that she wanted out, Larkin said. She urged her mother to hold on, that she would work to move her or would arrange more visits. But days later, her mother passed away.
“This is happening to people everywhere, and it’s because of lack of communication and lack of clear policies that are compassionate,” Larkin said. “Not enough is being done to protect families against deaths from isolation like my mother.”
Now is the time to expand visits for those vulnerable patients, who have grown lonely in the year since Connecticut saw its first diagnosed case of COVID-19, she said.
“It’s been one year since the lockdown was put in place for long-term care facilities,” said Sheilah Smith, co-chair of the Nathaniel Witherell Family Council, a patient-family advocacy group that organized the event.
“We need to let families back in,” Smith said.
“We call it a ‘banniversary’ because all visitors, including family members, have been banned from visiting their loved ones in long-term care facilities. That’s one year of isolation and starvation from human contact. Now it’s time to have a conversation about ending this,” she said.
Witherell’s visitation policy follows state guidelines, which changed in late September from a lockdown to lengthy list of conditions that must be met. Those rules include that there have been no new cases of COVID in 14 days among patients or staff members. Visitors must be screened, and social distancing is enforced, including use of appropriate PPE.
The Witherell allows outdoor visits or visits in its special pods on the property for up to 30 minutes.
Larry Simon, chair of Nathaniel Witherell’s Board of Directors, said he was sympathetic and said he hoped that the state guidelines would change soon.
“I would love to do that,” Simon said of expanded visits. “We’re going to start to lose more people through loneliness than COVID. … I am hoping that as vaccinations increase we will be able to allow more face-to-face visits. I would do that if it were up to me. I don’t see why family members, if they are vaccinated, can’t spend as much time as they want with their loved ones.”
Monday’s event included residents from across the state. The signs on Larkin’s lawn will be taken to Hartford for a large rally Friday.
Mystic resident Liz Sternono, from the Connecticut Caregivers for Compassion, said her mother passed away in a nursing home this past November. And she said there are tens of thousands of stories like hers across the country since the pandemic began.
Families need to see their loved ones because skilled nurses, even while they do great jobs, can’t replace family as caregivers and for support, Sternono said..
“We need our facilities to listen and regulators to regulate,” she said.
Mairead Painter, ombudsman at the Connecticut Partnership for Long Term Care, a state-run program working with private facilities and private insurers to help families, also spoke about the need for visits.
“The challenge here is this is really the fault of the pandemic,” Painter said.
Painter has held regular virtual meetings with residents of facilities such as Witherell as well as family members, advising them of their rights and taking their concerns to Gov. Ned Lamont’s office and the Department of Public Health.
From a local standpoint, Smith expressed urgency that workers at Witherell get the vaccine.
“For anybody who works in a nursing home, now that the vaccine is available, please take it,” she said. “COVID doesn’t discriminate against race or ethnicity. Please get the vaccine. Don’t continue to bring (the virus) into the facility because that keeps us locked out.”
According to Simon, nearly 35 percent of the staff has been vaccinated and about 40 more want to get the dosage. He said a special clinic at Town Hall will likely be held for them, but that would bring the vaccination rate only up to about 50 percent of staff.
“Different people have different reasons but not everybody wants to get vaccinated,” Simon said.
First Selectman Fred Camillo also spoke, offering his support for families.
“We all know people who have passed on and have died alone,” Camillo said. “That should never, ever happen. We all want to be careful, and we don’t want our most vulnerable to get sick and infected. But now there are vaccines and there is hope.”
Policies can be adjusted, and Camillo said he was certain they would be.
“Better days are ahead,” he said.