Guymon Daily Herald

USC and Lincoln Riley huge money... by Argus Hamilton

- Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in Hollywood and entertains groups and organizati­ons around the country. E-mail him at ArgusJokes@yahoo.com.

HOLLYWOOD--God Bless America, and how's everybody?

The Los Angeles Times published a biographic­al profile on the new coach of the USC Trojans football team Lincoln Riley and the huge financial deal the school gave him to leave Oklahoma. USC bought Lincoln and his family a $6 million home in Los Angeles. It's a one bedroom fixer-upper.

Oklahoma Sooners exin coach Bob Stoops stepped after Lincoln Riley left to coach OU in the Valero Bowl. Don't buy the gossip. Beer fore you read the Enquirer headline saying Bob Stoops is sleeping with the mother of one of the players you might want to know that his son plays wide receiver.

White Christmas won a

America's favorite Christmas forget the message that holiday a woman in West Texas froze to her car, despite repeated warnthat it's cold outside.

President Biden was hit by a Fox News poll saying Americans blame him for inflaness. tion and big city lawlessnes­s. The good news is, gasoline prices in Los Angeles hit an all-time low today when I drove off without paying. If I can just keep it to under nine hundredfif­ty dollars, it's no harm no foul.

White House Press Secretary Jen Psaki deflected reporters' questions about the higher prices for gasoline and groceries and household goods Tuesday by blaming the big meat producers. I doubt if that's a winning 2022 slogan. Inflation is so bad, Dollar Tree just changed its name to Tree-Fifty.

The House January 6th Committee began taking aim at Fox News stars and Trump Chief of Staff Mark Meadows. It's led by Neo-Con homecoming queen Liz Cheney. In this comedy, Trump gets impeached for withdrawin­g from the Middle East and undoing all of Dick Cheney's good works.

Laura Ingraham said the government may sound the alarm for one new variant after another this year to justify mail-in ballots in November. national poll Tuesday as song. I think we too often songs bring us. Last night death while walking to ings from her boyfriend

One pandemic goes away then another pandemic arrives. Yesterday the CDC warned that the number of CNN sex scandals is doubling every three days.

Fox News Sunday host Chris Wallace shocked colleagues Sunday by announcing he's leaving for CNN. I wonder if he's already a pervert or if he'll have to learn on the job. The word is that Chris Wallace already regrets the move after he learned his CNN producer thought he looks fourteen.

CNN fired the producer of CNN's New Day John Griffin after the FBI arrested him for using the Internet to recruit underage girls for sex. They always give themselves away. It raised a red flag when he pitched a Saturday morning kids show to CNN called Ghislaine Maxwell's Dance Party.

House Democrats are demanding to see all the emails of the Washington football team's front office sexual harassment scandal. It was already settled by the NFL. The team agreed to a $10 million fine, fired the harassers, and agreed the team's new name will be the Washington Weinstein's.

The FBI tracked down Mr. and Mrs, Crumbley last week, the fugitive parents of the white kid who shot up his school in Michigan. The Crumbley's decided to go to Detroit to hide. It was the dumbest move in Hide-and-Seek since O.J. Simpson tried to avoid capture by going to Orange County.

San Francisco's mayor admitted crime is out of hand and defunding police is a mistake. She's clamping down. The mayor just reduced the quality of towels in the homeless bath houses from Egyptian cotton to Terrycloth and asked everyone to please wash their hands after using the sidewalk.

The Hill touted Hillary Clinton as the Democrats' best candidate against Trump in 2024. One is a Goldwater Girl posing as a Democrat, the other a New York Democrat posing as a Republican. For the billion dollars this election will cost each party, you'd think they could nominate one of their own.

 ?? ?? Argus Hamilton
Argus Hamilton

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