New concession eats stepping up to plate at Minute Maid
In my annual rite of spring, I visited Minute Maid Park this week to sample all the new food the Astros will be offering — at very reasonable prices — this baseball season.
It’s a labor of love. I do love hot dogs and burgers and milkshakes.
For help on this assignment, I selected Robby Winston from my stable of stunt eaters. He’s my go-to guy when it comes to stadium concessions. Winston is considered a specialist in processed meats and root vegetables (hot dogs and french fries) on the eating circuit.
The big deal this year is that Tal’s Hill pasture in center field is gone, replaced by a bunch of new places to eat. That’s a better trade than the time the Astros got future Hall of Famer Jeff Bagwell from the Red Sox for a reliever named Larry Andersen, who lasted all of one season in Boston.
I was given the food tour by Mat Drain, the Chancellor of Cheeseburgers for Aramark, which governs the concession areas for the Astros. Aramark runs the hot-dog-and-pony show at eight other bigleague ballparks, so no rookie mistakes at Minute Maid.
The headline addition is Shake Shack in homerun territory on the main concourse. Be warned, there will be long lines for these legendary New York burgers, fries, dogs and concretes. The flagship ShackBurger, a cheeseburger topped with lettuce, tomato and ShackSauce, is $6.75. A double-patty ShackBurger is $9.75. The SmokeShack, with bacon and chopped cherry peppers, goes for $8.50 (single) and $11.25 (double). The ’Shroom Burger, with Portobello ’shrooms and melted muenster and cheddar, also is $8.50. If you like Vienna Beef hot dogs, here’s your place. Everywhere else in the stadium, you’ll find Nolan Ryan dogs. I rate that one a toss-up.
Here’s where the argument started. Shake Shack sells “concretes,” which are similar to Dairy Queen Blizzards. I said the word “concrete” is from New England; that’s where I ate one for the first (and only) time. Guy behind the counter said, “No, I grew up in Manhattan, and concretes are a New York thing.”
Really? Because I grew up in New York/Jersey and never heard the word “concrete” except in certain news stories about murder trials. That’s when Drain brought over a Shake Shack executive to settle the debate. She said, “I think concretes started in St. Louis.” Thanks for nothing.
Shake Shack has concocted a branded concrete for our team — the Astro Blast. It’s vanilla frozen custard blended with chocolate truffle cookie dough, broken bits of sugar cone and chocolate sprinkles. It’s $5.50 and carries some frightening news.
As Bill Maher would say, new rule: All menu boards must list the calories in each item. The Astro Blast Concrete packs 1,020 calories — and it’s not that big. Delicious, but delicious often carries a heavy load. I know, it’s unfair.
On to Torchy’s Tacos, another Tal’s Hill replacement, in dead center field. The wildly popular local chain reached out to the Astros, “We want in Minute Maid Park,” and the Astros bit. You’ll find all the Torchy’s faves, including Green Chili Pork ($6), Fried Avocado ($6), Beef Fajita ($8) and Trailer Park ($6).
I almost had a personal meltdown at the Astros Melt stand behind Section 114. Astros executive chef Dominic Soucie has created a SPAM Grilled Cheese Sandwich ($10). I usually scram from SPAM, but chef says keep an open mind.
“My wife is from Hawaii (where SPAM rules), and I tried it and started thinking outside the box of regular ballpark food. This sandwich has a thick slice of SPAM, the actual product you find in supermarkets. We use American cheese with a little Swiss so it’s not so salty,” Soucie said.
The Astros Melt stand also has an Italian Grilled Cheese Sandwich with salami, pepperoni, ham, pepperoncini, basil pesto and mozzarella on Texas toast ($10).
Something weird: Topps baseballcard company has a special series called “Incredible Eats,” 18 cards representing the best ballpark items from across the Major Leagues. The Astros’ Chicken & Waffle Cone made the starting lineup. It’s a large waffle cone filled with fried chicken nuggets and mashed potatoes with a drizzle of honey mustard. The card will be a sought-after collector’s item, made only slightly less valuable with Drain’s autograph.
The Budweiser Brew House on the main concourse is selling fresh-cut french fries for now and will add bar food in the future. I sampled the “coming soon” Sausage Burger, an 8-ounce Spicy Sausage Patty, grilled peppers and onions, garlic-wilted arugula and queso and beer mustard on a Slow Dough pretzel bun ($15). It’s like something you’d get at an Italian street festival, which is the best food anywhere. And you know me, I can’t get enough of garlic-wilted arugula.
In deep right field, you’ll find a convenience store selling packaged sandwiches, a self-service soda fountain, soft-serve ice cream and candy bars. Also, bottles of wine, which a friendly clerk will pour into a plastic carafe you can carry back to your seat.
The Butcher stand behind Sec. 224 has a tantalizing House Smoked Pork Butt Sandwich with jalapeño slaw on a jalapeño cheddar bun ($11.75). So you know, pork butt comes from a pig’s shoulder. Sorry to disappoint you Kim Kardashian fans.
Little Bigs behind Sec. 112 has new Grilled Chicken Sliders with homemade pickles ($11 for three of ’em) and Philly Cheesesteak Sliders wit’ provolone, onions and peppers ($11 for three).
What you won’t find at Minute Maid Park — gross, ridiculous, mountainous burgers with 25 pounds of patties and a pizza on top. Those may get a lot of publicity buzz in the national press, but the reality is, very few are sold.
“I am interested in new, creative items that people will actually buy and enjoy and buy again,” Drain said. “This is our biggest introduction of new concepts and menu items. We have 35 new things for our fans to try this season.”
As I was waddling out, I asked Drain, “Opening night is Monday. You won’t be able to sell beer the rest of the year if the Astros lose. Why?”
Drain rolled his eyes, “Because we will have lost the opener. Don’t you ever get tired of that stupid joke?”