How do you move past job regrets?
Q: I have worked with the same employer for over three years and built a good working relationship with my teammates, but earlier this year, I found a job opportunity that was hard to pass up. I accepted the offer because of the compensation and hybrid work schedule. To be honest, I made a mistake, and I should have tried to negotiate better pay with my previous employer instead of leaving. I can’t stop thinking about my mistake, which is starting to interfere with my current job. What is the best way to handle these regrets?
A: You are not alone in wrestling new job regret, as millions of people resigned last year.
The truth is that changing jobs for one that offers career growth and is beneficial to your goals is often a good decision. However, one major step can be easily overlooked and leads to regret later – leaving without a plan.
Dealing with regret is much like grieving; as much as you would like the discomfort to pass, it takes time.
Career mistakes happen, and they can be your best teachers for future moves.
Feeling regret over a decision will give you a wealth of information about how to make choices, your priorities, and your patience.
One of the best ways to handle regret is to think about your feelings and thoughts associated with the decision.
Examine what is behind the regret. Is it your work colleagues that you miss? The shared interests in working with a team? Do your best to leave the “I should have” behind.
It serves no purpose except to heap shame on your decisions. Instead, capture your thoughts on the compensation aspect. Turning down a good-paying position with a flexible work arrangement can be challenging.
There are various reasons why people leave their jobs, such as management, the company’s mission, pay, working conditions, commute time, and work culture. Think about how these could have impacted your decision.
Give yourself some time to engage with the new employer. It takes a while to build rapport with colleagues and your boss.
Rather than focus on what you did wrong in leaving your previous job, move forward to why you accepted this job.
This situation is an excellent time to pay attention to what is important in your career. The social aspects of work play a role in job satisfaction, but keep in mind that you can still stay in touch with your previous colleagues. They should be a part of your networking circle, and you may work together again in the future.
The key is to learn from regrets. They can make you stronger and heighten your self-awareness. Once you discover what is bothering you, it is easier to handle and move on.
Kimberly Thompson, M.Ed., is a National Board-Certified Counselor and Career Coach. Send questions to kim@careerrescue.com or visit her blog at chron.com/jobs.