Burgerfi Cheeseburger underwhelms
Just about every buzzword dear to the latest generation of upscale, pseudo-crunchy American burger chains appears on the website of BurgerFi.
The hundred-strong Florida-based company, which has launched Houston-area locations in Sugar Land and The Woodlands over the past year, wants you to know it’s “fresh” and “local” and “natural.” It is “farm to tray.” “Antibiotics” and “hormones” are invoked solely to be vehemently disowned.
They don’t serve beer, they serve “craft beer.” Beef is “free range.” “Frozen” is a dirty word, as is “microwave.” The busi- ness is run on “environmentally sustainable best practices,” including such “earth friendly” initiatives as chairs made from “recycled Coke bottles.” Seriously.
I saw no chairs made from recycled Coke bottles on a recent visit to the Sugar Land location of BurgerFi, which is perched above the long cypress pool that’s a centerpiece of First Colony Mall. (They were the ubiquitous Tolix armchair knockoffs, if you must know.)
What I did find was food of a surprisingly underwhelming nature, considering the overheated mission statement. Come along for a tour:
Price: BurgerFi Cheese- burger $5.97; Cry & Fries (half onion rings, half french fries) $4.97; Coffee Mocha Shake $4.47, for an after-tax total of $16.68.
Ordering: Step up to the counter to order, then take your buzzer to a table inside or outdoors and wait for it to go off.
Architecture: Salad stuff on top. On a toasted bun goes a swipe of pinkish, mayo-based “BurgerFi sauce,” a scattering of chopped raw onion, a 1⁄3- inchthick Angus patty, a square of American cheese, a second Angus patty, another square of American cheese, a slice of tomato and a leaf of iceberg lettuce. More pink “BurgerFi” Sauce goes on the top bun.
Quality: The two stacked Black Angus patties notwithstanding, there wasn’t a big bloom of beef flavor to this burger. In fact, the overall effect was fairly bland. Lacking the regulation Texas mustard-and-pickle pop (both of which could have been added by custom order), this corporately designed cheeseburger had only its insipid pink sauce to fall back on for added spark. Didn’t happen. If you’re going to put your company name on a signature burger sauce, please make it count for something.
The smallish buns, which bore one of those brave newfangled corporate cattle brands emblazoned across the top, quickly wrinkled up inside their paper sleeve, which was not a good look. And the narrow leaf of iceberg lettuce laid across the top patty was one of the saddest I’ve seen.
In general, I prefer a single, thicker patty to the doubled thin-patty style, with its double dose of seared surfaces, and this burger did nothing to change my mind.
Ooze factor: Not much to speak of. The patties weren’t dry by any means, but they had been cooked to well-done and presumably had shed some of their natural juices before they hit the bun.
Grade: C Bonus points: The counter service was at- tentive, and the manager walked through frequently checking on customers. The fresh-cut fries were crisp and good, with natural potato texture untrammeled by any freezer. And the enormous onion rings came sheathed in just enough batter, singed crisp, to show off the sweet onion flavor without masking it.
Minus points: Unfortunately, those magnificent-looking onion rings were so salty that it eventually got in the way of my enthusiasm and left me drinking quarts of water once I returned home. And though I had hopes for my frozen custard shake, the Coffee Mocha version that was advertised as “spun with coffee and a splash of chocolate syrup” turned out to display the kind of harsh, in-your-face coffee flavor I associate with those odious bottled syrups.
Local color: What I most enjoyed was the crisp, airy spaciousness of the industrial room, the cypress-tree view and the diverse crowd of Sugar Land patrons, who were dressed in everything from cargo shorts to hijab to most-fashionable-salesperson attire.
( burgerfi, 16535 U.S. 59 S., First Colony Mall, Sugar Land. 281-494-1196. Open 11 a.m.-10 p.m. Sundays-Thursdays; 11 a.m.-11 p.m. Fridays-Saturdays)