Time for tough talk with teens
This time of year can be painful for my husband and me, with graduation season, Mother’s Day and Father’s Day coming one after the other. The memories start flooding back. Losing a child is the worst thing that can happen to a parent. Losing our son, Dustin, is certainly the worst thing that ever happened to us.
Dustin was killed on July 10, 2004, when the car he was riding in crashed into a river, trapping him in the vehicle. The driver of the car was a teen who had alcohol and drugs in her system. She and another passenger survived, but Dustin drowned. Dustin was 18 years old, and just shy of his 19th birthday.
My son was not drunk, but he made a terrible decision. He got in the car with a drunk and drugged driver. And he paid the ultimate price.
As parents, we must talk to our children about alcohol, starting at an early age. We also have to teach them not to ride in a vehicle with someone who has been drinking or is otherwise impaired. According to the Texas Department of Transportation, last year 70 young people aged 12-20 were killed in Texas in traffic crashes involving underage drivers under the influence of alcohol.
Parents — not peers — are the No. 1 influence on their teen’s decisions about alcohol, including their decisions around riding with a drinking driver. We need to let our children know it’s never OK to get into a car with a driver who has been drinking, no matter who the driver is or what the circumstances are.
That’s why MADD developed its Power of Parents® program with national presenting sponsor Nationwide — to help parents talk confidently with their children about the dangers of underage drinking and never riding with a drinking driver. Parents can download Power of Parents handbooks and sign up for free online workshops at madd.org/powertalktx.
With prom and graduation season upon us, talk with your kids about not drinking until they’re 21. Remind them never to get in a vehicle with someone who has been drinking. Nights like prom or graduation should end in celebration, not tragedy.
Sadly, we can’t go back and save Dustin. On July 10 of every year, my husband and I start the day with Dustin’s favorite breakfast. We talk about our son. We think about his smile, his laughter, his fiery red hair and his freckles. For dinner, we have another one of Dustin’s favorite meals — mac and cheese — and then we go to the cemetery to visit him and to clean and decorate his memorial stone.
His death at the hands of a drunk and drugged driver was 100 percent preventable. While I couldn’t save Dustin’s life, I hope that my message and my work with MADD will help save the lives of others.