How psychics help families with grieving
Psychics and mediums offer a reassurance that it’s OK to let go and move on.
S
am Houston, the longdead 19th-century Texas governor and Bayou City’s namesake, thinks a border wall is pointless.
That’s not to say that he would think that if he were alive, but rather that, currently, he believes this from the other side.
I know this because Houston told me a couple months ago during a rambling — and exclusive — interview. This was all, of course, through a medium, because how else do you interview the dead?
“It is too late,” he said through Diane Gremmel, a Houston-based medium. “Evil lurks inside of many people and a wall cannot keep people out that are already in.”
Gremmel humored my bizarre request for contact, but she doesn’t typically spend her days seeking out bygone celebs or historical figures; she’s more often faced with the much more serious task of helping bereaved families
“I think the most important thing I can do in helping someone work through loss is confirm for them that their loved one still survives,” she said.
For some, Gremmel’s work may seem like utter hogwash. For others, psychics and mediums — part of a steadily growing $2 billion-a-year psychic services industry — offer a reassurance that it’s OK to let go and move on. Readings can restore belief in life’s goodness
Tucked in the bend of a winding hallway inside a corporate-looking building, Gremmel’s Westchase office is full of muted tones and comfy armchairs. It feels as much like a therapist’s workplace as a psychic’s domain.
But with bold red and black clothes and wearing a slightly steampunk heart pendant, Gremmel looks every bit the metaphysical part.
Since new clients schedule online, Gremmel purposely doesn’t get many details in advance. But at the start of the first appointment, she lays out the basics: This is not a seance. And it doesn’t go against religion.
“I relate to all religions,” she tells clients.
The Bible offers conflicting dictates on the supernatural, but 1 Corinthians 12:10 says the Spirit can give “miraculous powers” and “different kinds of gifts.” Gremmel considers her abilities one of them.
Still, she’s not conjuring up spirits, so she can’t guarantee who will talk during her sessions with clients — and she can’t guarantee that whoever’s talking is who they claim to be.
“It’s not a telephone where I can call people up. I’m a radio receiver and what gets broadcast to me is not
my choice,” she said. “Sometimes you want to talk to your mom and it’s Uncle George that comes in.”
It’s OK to cry during the readings, which is why there are tissues on the table. It’s best to hold hands. And it’s alright to ask questions and interrupt.
The most important ground rule: Have an open mind. “I’m not a weirdo, I’m really not.” This is a plea from Lois, a retired secretary and one of Gremmel’s customers who reached out to the psychic after her son killed himself six years ago.
Lois asked to be identified only by her first name because some of her friends are “not of the same mind” when it concerns the supernatural.
“I’ve always been into the metaphysical so I just thought, ‘I’ll go to a psychic because if anybody can help me to communicate with him, I want to try it even if nothing comes of it,’ ” Lois said.
“I was able to get a message through Diane and she was able to communicate with the spirits, and he said he was sorry and he loved me and he’s fine.” And that did it. After months of worry and regret, Lois was able to move on from her grief. She still had dreams about her departed son, but now they seemed imbued with a reassuring significance. She still saw things that reminded her of the 47-yearold she lost, but after her session with Gremmel, Lois took the time to stop and enjoy them.
“That is basically what gave me peace,” she said of her otherworldly communications.
And in addition to hearing from her son, Lois believes she passed some words along to him.
“I think the message I wanted to give him is don’t worry about me, I’m fine, and I release you to be on the other side,” she said.
The 76-year-old is well aware that not everyone shares her belief in the power of psychics, but that doesn’t take anything away from the relief it’s brought her.
“I know what’s my truth and I don’t need for anyone to agree with me,” she said.
Gremmel was 8 years old the first time she saw a spirit.
It was her grandfather. He’d been sick in the hospital, but when he suddenly appeared in the corner of her bedroom, she knew he was gone.
“I knew before either of my parents told me,” she said.
She continued to have metaphysical experiences while growing up in Houston, but Gremmel didn’t share those otherworldy connections with her peers.
“People didn’t react well to it because this is the Bible belt,” she said. As she grew up, she tried to fit in and eventually moved away from Houston and launched a career in marketing.
But after 12 years in the Baltimore area, she decided to come home.
“I needed to revisit the past,” Gremmel said. So she returned to an old city to start a new life. After some hesitation, she decided to open up her own business
“It suddenly struck me that I don’t need to put my resume out and if I’m meant to do this I’ll just ask for a sign,” she said. “And someone contacted me almost immediately asking for a reading.” She took that as the sign. For a time, Gremmel did readings on the phone and out of her apartment and then a little over a decade ago she found a home in the Houston branch of Edgar Cayce’s Association for Research and Enlightenment. When the center announced its impending closure earlier this year, Gremmel struck out on her own in a Westchase office.
Listen to 70-year-old Nancy Marlowe and the psychic will tell you there’s a great demand for her ability.
The former day trader turned psychic says that helping people work through grief is a big part of her job.
“When I started this 20 years ago it wasn’t on TV, it was hidden,” Marlowe said. “If you talked about this, you were a screwball. The demand was there, but you couldn’t talk about it.”
Over the years, mediumship has come out into the open, and turns out that it bears some similarities to traditional approaches, like grief counseling.
Andrea Sams, a counselor and grief recovery specialist who heads up Explore Growth Counseling and Consulting in Houston, said she doesn’t believe in psychics or mediums, but does see value in their work.
“One of my approaches is somewhat similar, to the point where I could see how people could find some relief from that,” she said.
Sometimes, she said, counselors ask grieving clients to write letters or pretend to talk to family members who have died.
“One major part of grief recovery is dealing with unresolved issues, communications that never got to happen,” she said. “So having the opportunity to communicate with that person in some way indirectly can be therapeutic.”
For Marlowe, communicating with the dead can be about more than just closure.
“When you do a mediumship reading with an authentic medium, it restores your belief in eternal life and it restores your belief in the goodness of life and of love,” she said.
Sometimes, though, it also can just restore belief in the completely bizarre.
Sam Houston — or at least a spirit claiming to be him — offered only a vague take on modern-day politics.
“Any politician who doesn’t have their heart geared in a way toward what is best for all Americans he can’t support,” Gremmel said, paraphrasing the former Texan’s message.
But, specifically, would Houston be a Donald Trump supporter?
“I didn’t get a clear yes or no on that,” Gremmel said. “I’m not gonna put words in his mouth.”