Widow should contact estate-planning attorney about home

Q: I’m a widow, and I own my house free and clear. It’s the main thing I own. I’ve recently developed cancer, and I think it’s time to make a will, and I don’t know what’s the right thing to do about who to leave it to. My children are all happily married. One daughter has two children; one daughter has three; and my son has none. How is this usually done? — askedith.com

A: There isn’t a “usual” way it’s done. You could leave the property equally to your children, one-third to each. Lawyers call that “per stirpes.”

Or, you could leave a larger share to the daughter with three children. Or skip a generation and leave the place equally to your five grandchildren. Or leave it to whichever family has the most need.

If you don’t have a lawyer, call a local law firm and ask who specializes in estate planning. Then go in to discuss the matter; get advice; make your own decisions; and sign a will.

Messy divorce

Q: In my divorce last year, I got the house and my husband was ordered to pay off the mortgage, which was in his name. He says he did, but he lies a lot, and now we’re not talking to each other. He and his new wife bought a house in another state. I’m not getting any mail about the mortgage, but I’d like some proof it’s been paid off. How can I find out? — R. T.

A: If the loan was paid off, your county public records office should have a copy of a satisfaction document in which the lender says the debt was entirely cleared. Those records are called public because anyone is entitled to see them. You can go in yourself and search the records, or you can look at them online.

If the satisfaction of your mortgage is on record there, you could always order an inexpensive copy, but you don’t really need one. And if the document isn’t there, it’ll be time to talk with a lawyer, probably the one who handled your divorce.

Sister won’t sell

Q: When my mother died, she left her house and farm to me and my sister. We have received an offer to buy it, but my sister won’t agree. Is there anything I can do? We own equal shares. — X.

A: Any co-owner of real estate has the right to go to court and request a forced sale and division of the proceeds. (Exception: In many states, homestead laws protect a spouse.)

The process is known as partition. That wouldn’t do much for your relationship with your sister, though. Perhaps mentioning that you don’t want to have to go to court will help.