Ex’s harassment mars wife’s happy divorce

Dear Abby: I am happily divorced after nearly 20 years. My ex cheated throughout our marriage, lied repeatedly and was abusive. He left me for another woman.

When he left, I didn’t correct any of the lies he told his family, girlfriends, friends and acquaintances. My issue is, he is still lying to everyone about how our marriage ended.

He complains about having to pay child support and alimony. I have asked him to leave me alone and not speak to me unless it’s about our son, but he won’t. I have warned him if he doesn’t stop bothering me I’m going to tell his girlfriend, family and friends the truth about everything. Should I tell them? — Burdened By Him In Florida

Dear Burdened: be considered malicious mischief or harassment.

Dear Abby: I have several friends who think it is OK to interrupt a conversation by shoving a phone in my hands to look at their cute grandchildren, the casserole they made yesterday or something equally boring. How can I politely refuse them? — Don’t Care In El Paso, Texas

Dear Don’t Care: If your conversation is being interrupted by a third party, it would not be rude to ask the person to wait until you are finished. If the person you are talking with does this, you are stuck. While I agree the behavior is rude, unless you want to risk offending, briefly offer the praise that’s being sought and hand the phone back.

Dear Abby: plans for an elaborate wedding. The other sent a Christmas card with her new boyfriend because they are now living together.

Does the niece forgoing marriage also forfeit her opportunity to acquire wedding gifts? Or does her card constitute a “coupling announcement” for which a gift card would be appropriate? — Perplexed In California

Dear Perplexed: The niece who is cohabiting sent you a Christmas card, not a “coupling announcement.” Cross your fingers that all goes well for her and the boyfriend, and perhaps — in a year or two — you will receive an invitation for their wedding.

To My Readers: The eight days of the Jewish celebration of Hanukkah begin at sundown. A joyous Festival of Lights to all of us!