Grandma reluctant to share that title
DEAR ABBY: My granddaughter, “Emily,” is 13. My daughter, “Ginger,” is divorced and has had a boyfriend, “Greg,” for about three years, but there has been no talk of marriage.
Greg’s mother has told Emily to call her “Grandma.” Emily is OK with that, but it hurt my feelings.
I realize she’s trying to make Emily feel like part of their family, but this is MY title. To me, she should be called something special but not “Grandma.”
Shouldn’t the other “grandma” have realized she’s pushing herself into the position of the real grandma? — Hurt Grandma in California
DEAR HURT: You are taking this too personally. If Greg’s mother wasn’t hoping her son would marry your daughter, she would not be “embracing” Emily the way she has.
Your granddaughter does not love this woman more than she does you. I’m sure she didn’t do this to annoy you. If you bring this up with her, you WILL annoy HER, which will likely annoy her son and your daughter. I’m betting that eventually she will become an official grandma — however, if that doesn’t happen, your problem will be solved because she’ll be history.
DEAR ABBY: My husband’s sisters have invited themselves to our home. They hate me. One’s husband sexually assaulted me. When I had her come and get him, she accused me of making it up!
The other sister has never invited us over for dinners or special events. She’s obese and will break our furniture.
We are in our 70s, live modestly and can’t afford this selfish intrusion. My husband says, “But they’re my sisters!” Please help me get out of this. — Looking for Peace
DEAR LOOKING: You and your husband are not joined at the hip. No law says you must be there.
Yes, they are his sisters, so he can visit them in THEIR homes.
DEAR ABBY: I have a friend whose father recently passed away. Her mother passed away eight years ago. Everything was paid for — all funeral arrangements and anything else you can think of.
She’s wondering what to do with the money she received in the cards people sent her. Her sibling took some of the cards from her mom’s funeral and applied the money toward a vacation. My friend just wants to do the right thing. What is the right thing? — Wants to Do What’s Right
DEAR WANTS: If the money isn’t needed for expenses, it is the recipient’s to do with as she (or he) wishes. However, a thoughtful and respectful thing to do would be to donate it to a charity her father supported, or toward research into a cure for the disease that took his life.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www. Dearabby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.