Las Vegas Review-Journal

Wedding disinvite causes hurt feelings

- JEANNE PHILLIPS Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.Dearabby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069

DEAR ABBY: My young daughter is the half-sister of a famous athlete’s wife. They were married last year and invited my daughter. A week later they Disinvited her! There is a 20-year gap in their ages, but my daughter looks up to her half-sister. My daughter’s feelings were really hurt. My feelings may have been even more hurt. All of her other siblings were there, as well as several other family members.

We were never told why my daughter was disinvited. My daughter is getting older, and she knows who her brotherin-law is when she sees him on TV. How can I stop being angry at these people for hurting my baby? — Furious Mama in Michigan

DEAR MAMA: You stated there is a 20-year age gap between your daughter and the bride. Is it possible that the bride and her famous fiance had concerns about someone so young (7, 8, 9?) at their high-profile wedding? Before your resentment continues to build, try having a rational conversati­on with your daughter’s half-sister so you fully understand the circumstan­ces. While I do not support disinvitin­g someone from a celebratio­n, it’s possible that the invitation was sent in error.

DEAR ABBY: My son, who is 32, moved back home six months ago. He’s a college graduate with a degree in business, which he has never used. He works as a valet at a well-known golf and spa resort. He has no health insurance and stays in his room a lot playing video games. How can I help him find himself? — Kid’s Mom in Florida

DEAR MOM: Is your son suffering from depression or some other emotional problem? Is he at least paying rent? If the answer to that question is no, help your son “find himself ” by encouragin­g him to become independen­t and by refusing to continue allowing him to avoid accepting responsibi­lity for himself by hiding in his room playing video games.

DEAR ABBY: For his 60th birthday, my niece gave her brother a handmade quilt of pictures of their paternal grandmothe­r and her second husband. There was not one picture of his maternal grandparen­ts, who practicall­y raised them. Their mother (my sister) argued with me that I was wrong to question why our parents were excluded. I would love to know your opinion. — Wondering in the East

DEAR WONDERING: This was none of your business, and you should have stayed out of it. Although you are entitled to your feelings, your niece gave her brother a gift from the heart, which took time and effort to create. You were wrong to criticize.

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