Husband thought he was invincible
Dr. Wallace: I’m a 77-year-old grandmother, but I enjoy reading your column to find out all about our young adults who will soon be the leaders of our country. I would like to address the issue of teens smoking cigarettes.
When I was 18, I married my grade-school sweetheart, who was 19. We had a wonderful marriage and raised three wonderful children. I am now living with my oldest son and his family. They are very kind to allow me to live in their home instead of an adult care home.
My husband started smoking when he was 15 because it was the thing to do then. When we married, he was smoking about two packs per day. Even then, I knew that cigarette smoking was dangerous to one’s health and tried to get him to quit or at least to smoke less. It was a total waste of time. He was 100 percent addicted to nicotine. But he did honor my wishes and did not smoke in the house.
In the spring of 1975 he was diagnosed with cancer of the lung. He had treatment (radiation), but the cancer was too advanced. He died three months later. My husband truly believed that he was invincible and would live to be 100 — and would smoke two packs of cigarettes to celebrate his 100th birthday.
Cigarettes stole my dear husband from me like a thief in the night! Neither one of us knew he had a medical problem until it was too late. I’ve been a widow for over 40 years. It’s been a very lonely life for me. I miss my husband and I think about him every day.
As you can see by my ‘chicken scratching,’ it is taking me a long time to write this letter, but I feel I must take this time to tell my story to the
ROBERT WALLACE
young people who read your column. Our teens need to understand that even though they are filled with exuberance and boundless energy, all this will, in time, be eroded by the ravages of cigarette smoke. Though it happens over a period of many years (which gives the smoker a false sense of security), cigarette smoking does kill! — Grandmother, Orlando, Fla.
Grandmother: Even though the column is written to assist teens, comments from adults, especially grandmothers, are always welcomes. Thanks for your ‘chicken scratching.’ It’s important that young adults learn from their elders who have a vast range of experience and can tell it like it is.
Teens must be made aware that smoking cigarettes is dangerous to their health and although they don’t always experience symptoms right away, the smoke is taking its toll over time and very often ends in devastating illness and even death. And the surviving family members are left with a void that allows no turning back.
Dr. Wallace: I was going steady with a girl and we both said we loved each other very much. Out of the blue she broke up with me because she was unhappy with something I did. I admitted I was wrong and that it would never happen again. I begged her to return to me, but she refused.
I told her that if she really loved me, she would forgive me for making one little mistake. Don’t you agree with me’ — Ron, Elkhart, Ind.
Ron: It all depends on what that mistake was. Write me again and tell me about the mistake, and then I’ll answer your question.