Love, courage and common sense will help

Dr. Wallace: I have a 17year-old daughter and a 15year-old son. They are good kids. Recently, I married a man who has custody of three young children, ages 6, 4, and 3. I love our new family and don’t foresee any problems because of the children’s age differences. My mother thinks the children might fight among themselves, which will cause my husband and me to fight. Do you see the children’s age difference as a major concern? — Mom, Syracuse, N.Y.

Mom: The age differences are by no means an insurmountable problem. Just be sure your daughter and son do not start giving orders and assume the role of “boss” of the younger children. There’s no reason your new marriage cannot be successful. All that is needed is plenty of love, courage and common sense — just what all families need.

Dr. Wallace: I’m 16 and constantly battling my father, who never gives me credit for anything I do. He gets on my case for the smallest things. For example, yesterday he got upset because I didn’t shut the garage door tight after I put my bike away. Because of my mistake, he called me a stupid ingrate.

ROBERT WALLACE

When I told him I was tired of hearing his unkind words, all he said was, “If you don’t like it around here, leave.”

He is always saying that. If I decide to leave and live with a friend’s family, could my dad force me to return home after he told me to leave? I’m really considering leaving and my friend said I could live with his family. — Nameless, Quincy, Ill.

Nameless: When your father says to leave if you don’t like it, what he’s really saying is that he’s not about to change the way he operates, so you’d better get used to it.

If you did decide to leave, your father could — and I’m quite sure he would — insist that you return home.

I suggest that you pay more attention to the “smallest things.” And also consider this: Your bike could have been stolen because of that “smallest thing.”