To be polite, or not be polite, that is the question

In a effort to create a more collaborative local government, the city of Poco Loco recently hired a consultant to address bullying on the City Council. In a little town west of the Pecos, an unexpected turn of events happened when the $350,000 consultant finished his week-long didactic presentation.

“After an informative and cost-effective training program on the subject, we simply aren’t getting the job done,” said Mayor Flash Dancer.

“Members of the Council are now just too polite with each other. They are spending all of their time being courteous and allowing others to speak without constraints or criticism.”

Another example of an unintended consequence involves meetings dragging well into the night. No one will interrupt speakers during the public comment section. It is especially problematic with those who don’t have sense enough to know when to shut up.

“Ministers can be some of our biggest offenders in this area,” said Councilwoman Fayre Player. Their congregations won’t give them a hint about loquaciousness because church members are too polite.”

As a side comment, when asked where she learned such a big word, Player responded, “I don’t know, but it certainly wasn’t in school!”

Player opined that bullying may not be as bad as first thought. This behavior has been going on all the time in the national media, as evidenced by regular attacks on various politicians and their policies.

She felt there must be some purpose to this methodology or else why would they continue to do it?

Therefore, the Council may have made a mistake by trying to reverse episodes of spontaneous, as well as deviously planned aggressive communication among its members.

One city official disagrees that the recently completed anti-bullying program was a waste of time. “We learned much from this experience,” said Buck Passer. “For example, I learned to always address people by their formal titles and never by first names. I discovered there are pecking orders and that seniority in a group trumps all. I also found out that we should always let the other person speak first.”

The last point has proved to be a distraction, as most of the meetings are now spent with people saying, “Please, my dear colleague — You go first.” “Oh no, my honorable comrade — after you!”

But one lone dissenter, Councilman Sun Ray, wants to put an end to all the nonsense.

“I’ve had it with Sovietstyle education camp brainwashing,” he said. “We’ve had courses on sexual harassment, bigotry, diversity, cultural sensitivity, religious miscellany, gender-neutral bathrooms, white privilege, global warming and now bullying.

If we haven’t learned how to respect each other at this point in our lives, one more politically correct course is not going to make any difference.”

Ray also pointed out that we are small potatoes, but Washington politicians are about as rude and disingenuous as just about anyone can get.

“If bullying behavior is good enough for the big fish, then it should be good enough for us!”

So far, there has been little public comment on the matter. Most of the citizens go about their daily lives and hope that the adolescent behavior of their elected officials will evolve into something more mature and productive

One person suggested a different type of outside consultant might be in order:

“I would like to see them bring in a seasoned Shakespearean actor,” the middle-aged man said. “Perhaps he could refocus the Council. The thespian could simply start off with the following thought for all to contemplate:”

“To be polite, or not be polite, that is the question.”

Now that’s not a bad idea coming from a regular guy on the street — wouldn’t you agree?