Looking for love

Dear Annie: I am a college-age male and in desperate need of your advice. There is in my class a wonderful young woman, someone with whom I have talked often but never deeply. I want to get to know her better but simply do not know how; in fact, I do not even know whether she is as interested in me as I am in her. This is made worse by my autism, which prevents me from detecting emotions and social cues.

What should I do? I seek someone whose hand I can hold and whose eyes light up when they look on me. That is all I want and all I need. — Forsaken

Dear Forsaken: There are a great number of books that go into more depth about the unwritten rules of dating than I ever could here, and some are geared toward people with autism — Kerry Magro’s ”Autism and Falling in Love” and Joe Navarro’s ”Ten ’Must Know’ Body Language Secrets for Dating,” to name just two.

But I will say that the best romantic relationships start as friendships, so you’re off to a good start simply by talking to this young woman often. Perhaps you could ask whether she’d like to get coffee sometime. If she says yes, take the opportunity to build a connection by asking about her background — where she is from, whether she has any siblings, what she’s hoping to do after college, etc. Tell her about yourself in equal measure.

And if she turns down your invitation, don’t despair. I promise, everyone has felt the sting of rejection at some point or another. Simply take it as practice for asking out the next girl who sparks your interest.