An inexpensive gift will work
Dr. Wallace: I’ve gone out with a guy three times. For the time being, we are just going to date with the freedom to date others if we choose. He has a birthday coming up in three weeks. I don’t want to seem pushy or overeager, but I’d like to get him a birthday gift.
My sister and mother think I shouldn’t because we “don’t know each other that well.” It so happens that we will be going out that night. That was his decision. If he would have been given a birthday party, then my gift wouldn’t have seemed so significant.
What should I do? — Curious, Santa Fe, N. M.
Curious: An inexpensive ($10-$15) non-personal gift would be appreciated.
Dr. Wallace: Marty and I had been very best friends for several years when she moved to California because her father, who is in the military, got stationed there. We missed each other and stayed in touch by mail and an occasional phone call.
Last week she called and said her father was transferred back to Pensacola and she’d be over to see me in an hour. I was happy my best friend had returned home. She kept her word and came over, but when I looked at her I was shocked. She was wearing revealing clothes and had a ring hanging on each nostril of her nose. I could also smell tobacco on her clothes. This wasn’t the same Marty who had moved away a year and a half ago!
She stayed only about an hour and that was good because my parents weren’t at home to see her. She gave me her telephone number and asked me to call her. I haven’t called her yet because I still haven’t decided if I want to
ROBERT WALLACE
be friends with “the new Marty.” I probably should call her, but I really don’t know what to say. Help! — Surprised, Pensacola, Fla.
Surprised: Call and make a date to meet her somewhere so you can have a nice chat. Find out what she has been doing for the past 18 months. Ask a lot of questions and be a good listener. At the end of the get-together, you will know, if deep down, she is still the same old Marty, or someone new that you don’t know at all.
If you decide that she has indeed, turned out a new, less likeable, version of Marty, continue to consider her a friend, but simply one you won’t be seeing regularly.
Dr. Wallace: What are “roofies” and are they legal? My brother and his friends are talking about getting some. Somehow I don’t think they’re legal. What effects do they have on humans? — Nameless, Erie, Pa.
Nameless: “Roofies” is the street name for Rohypnol, which is related to the sedative Valium, only 10 times more potent. Roofies are illegal in the United States and Canada, but can be purchased with a prescription in Mexico, South America, and Asia. The stuff is highly addictive and extremely dangerous, according to the U.S. Drug Enforcement Administration. Roofies are also known as the “date-rape drug.” A female can lose consciousness and thus become sexually vulnerable when roofies are slipped into her drink.
Tell your parents immediately about the possibility of your brother buying this illegal drug. Don’t delay!