Friend is feeling like an afterthought
Dear Annie: I’ve known my friend since sixth grade. We talk on the phone a few times a week, and she says that I am her best friend. She and her husband moved to Florida a little over four years ago. Every time she’s come back to visit — four times so far — she’s not made time to see me.
I live 90 minutes away from where she stays and always invite her to come to see me. I even offer to meet halfway to have dinner or lunch, but she says she can’t because she has family to see.
When I traveled down to Florida once, this friend kept telling me that I had to come see her. My time was also limited because I also had family to visit, but I extended my vacation two days to see her. I feel like she puts no effort when it comes to seeing me. I feel like a phone buddy. Do you have advice? — Backburner Friend
Dear Backburner: This is a dilemma all transplants face when returning home for visits: how to divvy their time between friends and family without leaving anyone feeling shortchanged. Reiterate to her how much it would mean for her to pay you a visit. If she feels too pressured to spend all her time in that region with family, then plan a girls’ trip where the two of you meet in another town for a weekend. Make it a yearly or twice-yearly tradition. And savor the fact that you have such a close friendship.
Dear Annie: In the current April 2021 edition of the AARP Bulletin is an in-depth article, “Inside an International Tech-Support Scam.” If you can acquire a copy, the information in this article could give you a tremendous amount of ammunition with which to assist those such as “Love Two Men.”
I doubt if AARP would object to your sharing such information. Your inclusion of warnings from the FBI triggered my idea to share with you the above-mentioned resource. — Jim Banks
Dear Jim: Thank you for the tip about this compelling investigative report from AARP. I encourage everyone to find it online at www.tinyurl.com/ aarptech-report. It’s worth your time.
And sign up for AARP’s free Watchdog Alerts or call their tollfree fraud helpline at 877908-3360 if you or a loved one suspect you’ve been a victim.
Dear Annie: After years of being in an icecold marriage for many years, I have finally divorced. I am in my late 60s, active, fit and interested in dating and meeting “the right guy.”
I have lots of friends and many are single women. I have heard so many stories, some hilarious and some disastrous, of people in my age group dating.
One thing that has piqued my curiosity is that many stories include disappointment in the intimacy department. It appears that women my age are more interested and capable than men are in this area of the relationship. Is it true?
I am still hopeful that I can find a well-rounded, monogamous, fulfilling relationship — even at this age. Say it isn’t true! — Looking for Love
Dear Looking: The bad news is that men tend to experience lower libido as they get older, and erectile dysfunction is also common. This can be due to hormonal changes, medications (including ACE inhibitors), mood disorders or, in the case of erectile dysfunction, cardiovascular trouble. The good news is that it’s not inevitable. And men who lead a fit, healthy lifestyle are less likely to have these issues. Get out there and start meeting people, and you may be pleasantly surprised.