She wants to know who’s on guest list

Dear Amy: I just received a “Save the Date” announcement for a wedding. One of my family members did not get one.

Is it OK to ask the couple if that person will be invited?

My attendance will be affected by whether this family member is included. I’m curious about how to respond.

(Maybe) Saving

the Date

Dear Maybe: It’s OK to ask, as long as you don’t try to influence the choice of the couple as they build their guest list. You could inquire, “I’m wondering if cousin ‘Joe’ is also going to be invited? No pressure either way — but it would be helpful as I make my plans if you could let me know.”

Dear Amy: In response to “Dejected,” the lady whose husband doesn’t compliment her, I had a similar problem with my fiance.

I rarely got the compliments I needed, and I asked my therapist about it. He told me that I need to express my needs. So now when I feel low, I simply say, “Honey, I don’t feel very attractive today. Would you please tell me that I’m pretty?” It makes things so much easier. He’s not being labeled a jerk, and I’m not disappointed when I don’t get what I want.

Happy to Request