Teen gets speeding ticket
Our 16-yearold, recently licensed daughter was pulled over today for doing 32 in a 20-mph school zone. She has to enter a fourlane road with heavy traffic and obstructed visibility just below the crest of a hill. She accelerated too fast and was immediately stopped by a cop who had set up a speed trap for people speeding down the hill (one of the reasons she has anxiety about pulling out into traffic to begin with).
She is not a scofflaw and was very upset by the interaction.
Her stepmother (my wife) wants to take the car away for three weeks and make her pay any increase in insurance rates that accrue due to this incident, along with any fines (she doesn’t have a job yet). She’s at her mother’s house now but will be back with us tomorrow.
I think that’s excessive. I believe the consequences should match the severity and willfulness of the act. In this case, I see no willfulness and lots of contrition on her part, so I’m for letting it go with a warning and having her pay any fine she may receive. What say you, Amy? Upset Father Dear Father: Your daughter is an inexperienced driver. All of the adults involved need to understand that everything that happened here (aside from the speeding in a school zone) is a good thing. She should not take routes that scare her until she feels ready to handle merging into traffic at the correct rate of speed.
Although having a teen driver with a speeding offense boosts insurance rates, contact your insurance provider to see what programs they offer for teens to clean up their record. High grades, weekend defensive driving courses and perfect attendance at school can help.
I don’t agree with your wife’s idea of taking the car away and further punishing your daughter. Your daughter needs more time (supervised) on the road — not less. Yes, I agree with you that she should pay the speeding fine. She should participate in programs to control your insurance rates. You should all see this as a very common learning opportunity.
Dear Amy: I married about a year and a half ago. I changed my last name and my email account name.
Prior to getting married, my email address was based on my maiden name, and now it is based on my married name.
Several people still contact me via my old email address. I have asked them to change it in their contact list, but they still contact me via the old email address, which is based on my maiden name.
Is there a way to deal with this not-so-major matter without making a big fuss? Newly Married Dear Newly Married: This is happening because when any of us fills out the “To:” address field to send an email, the provider will guess (usually correctly) who we are addressing it to, and autofill the remainder of the address. Because historically emails were generated to and from this previous address, people will continue to use it.
One way to get this changed is to always send and reply from your current (corrected) address. (Don’t click reply from the incorrect address.) That way the email chain will essentially switch over to your current address. Run a signature line reminding people to change your address in their contacts list.
Send questions for Amy Dickinson to askamy@ amydickinson.com.