The music of fussing kids

Dear Amy: I recently attended a community band concert that was spoiled by small children crying and fussing. The family was sitting at the front, so they added to the distraction by not only walking the entire length of the auditorium to remove the crying children but returning with them later — all the way to the front.

What is wrong with inconsiderate people who ruin a pleasant experience, not only for the other concertgoers but also for the performers who have worked hard to put on the performance?

I understand that parents want to expose their children to varied cultural experiences, but unless the venue has a family “cry room” they should not expect them to sit still for a long performance.

What should one say to these parents? Tell them to sit in the back row so they can make a hasty exit? Ask them to leave and not come back? Leave the kiddies at home with a babysitter?

Distracted

Dear Distracted: It is a shame that young members of the community spoiled your experience.

This is a community concert, where dedicated amateur musicians dust off instruments from the back of their closets, attend a number of rehearsals, and perform for a grateful and understanding audience. It’s a fun and challenging opportunity to show your chops alongside your friends and neighbors and perform in a low-pressure setting.

Yes, parents should hustle crying babies out — and then bring them back in when they’ve calmed down.

But remember: Many people are only now venturing out again after years of being sequestered. It’s noisy out here in the world!

You might try to hear the fractious babies’ noises as part of the larger human symphony. To many of us, it truly is music to our ears.

Dear Amy: Before my son was born over 40 years ago, my ex-husband was said to have a low sperm count.

We decided to use artificial insemination to conceive our eldest. After he was born, we had two more children naturally, without artificial insemination.

My problem is that I don’t know if I should tell my son.

My husband and I divorced after 20 years of marriage. We both remarried.

I’ve tried to communicate with my ex, and though we are on friendly terms, he refuses to answer my texts about this. He obviously does not want to deal with it.

I think my son should know. After my ex and I are dead, he or one of his children may have a medical issue where he needs to know the facts of his conception.

Your advice? Mom

Dear Mom: You feel strongly that your son should know the truth of his conception. I agree.

Even without his father participating in this important conversation, you are his mother, and you should go ahead and tell him.

Your son might greet this news with shock, disbelief and sadness. He might face a challenge wondering how he relates to his father and siblings. He might choose to shelve this topic permanently or pick it up later.

Open the door, and keep it open. Let him walk through. Answer every question truthfully, and offer your continued support.

The Donor Sibling Registry (donorsiblingregistry .com) offers an array of information for donor-conceived people and their families.