Turn up the scam detector

Dear Amy: I recently met a nice older man online.

After a few emails and phone calls, “Rob” and I went on several dates.

Despite the difference in our ages (I’m 30, and he’s closer to 60), we have many common interests and enjoy spending time together.

Romantically, he is quite shy. So far, just hand holding on walks and a goodnight kiss on the cheek.

Conversation the other night turned to money. I mentioned how the lease to my barely affordable apartment would expire soon.

He then offered to let me live with him — for free! Wow!

He has to pay utilities, insurance and property tax anyway, so he said I would not increase his expenses.

Then he suggested I should use the savings to pay down my student loans and credit card debt.

I asked him how I could ever repay his generosity. He responded, “You could repay me by being the best possible mother to our future children.” I’m not sure if he was joking or serious!

Should I accept his offer? It would be great to finally pay off my debts.

However, my friends and family will no doubt label me a gold digger.

Plus, I’m not quite ready for marriage and children.

Is this offer too good to be true?

Wondering

Dear Wondering: You might call this offer too good to be true. I’d call it too risky to contemplate.

If you offer your babymaking capabilities in exchange for living expenses, you would never retire your debt — you’d only exchange it for a different currency.

Have you never seen even one true-crime program, or listened to a podcast?

If you had, you’d be skeptical enough to look into his background, social media and dating app presence to try to gauge his intent.

His suggestion about you being the mother of his children might have been a joke, or a suggestion designed to steer you in a specific direction. Either way, you don’t even know him well enough to decode his intent.

If you did participate in this, you’d be trapped in the household. That’s the bestcase scenario.

The worst-case scenario involves a “missing” poster with your picture on it and a camera crew from “Dateline” at your folks’ door.

Ask friends and family for ideas about your finances. You could get a roommate or a second job, or perhaps ask your folks if you could move in with them to save money.

Dear Amy: My wife and I are in our late 20s. We managed to buy our own house last year and are planning to have a child within the next couple of years or so.

My wife has started heavily advocating for her parents to move in with us.

I would consider it if they were unwell and needing help, but they are in their late 50s, healthy and live about an hour away.

I do not get along with them; we’ve had some issues over the last five years. I don’t blame them entirely for these clashes, but their behavior to me has been very disrespectful. I’m talking about oil meeting water.

How do I approach this?

Loving Husband

Dear Husband: You approach this by emphatically declaring that you will not cohabit with her parents.

Don’t put her folks down. Do say that you and she are forming a household and a family together, and it is vital that you not introduce oil into your placid waters.