One-time model wonders what to do with nude portraits
DEAR ABBY: During my
30s (I am now mid-70s), I did some nude modeling for several reputable photographers, which resulted in some lovely portraits. A few of them have been framed and hang on my bedroom wall.
My family members are aware of them, but they are very religious (which I am not), so I don’t know how to dispose of them. Should I try to sell them, and if so, how? Should I bequeath them to someone, or should they be left for my estate executor to deal with? What to do? -- PORTRAITS IN THE SOUTH
DEAR PORTRAITS: Definitely discuss this with your executor well before the need arises. If the photographers are wellknown, go online and find out if there’s a market for their work. Offer the portraits for sale and see if there is any interest. You could also bequeath them to an “openminded” relative or friend. I wish you luck.
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DEAR ABBY: In a response to “Ganged Up On” (Dec. 23), you stated that it is against the law to hit a child in California. It was in response to a woman whose mother-in-law spanked her grandchild. I was born in California and lived there more than 50 years, and I believe you misinterpreted the penal code.
It is not illegal to spank in California. It is illegal to use excessive force, or to cause traumatic injury when doing it. I don’t personally believe that a child should be hit, but it is not “illegal.” In fact, corporal punishment, not abuse, is legal in every state in the U.S. -- DENISE E. IN NEVADA
DEAR DENISE: Mea culpa. I stand corrected. You are not the only reader I heard from after printing that answer. Thank you for straightening me out about this.
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DEAR ABBY: I met a man online and have been dating him off and on for the past four years. His parents have been living with him since the pandemic, and I have yet to be invited to his home or to meet them. He is from Bolivia and says his parents want him to marry a Catholic Bolivian girl -- and someone without children. I am divorced, American and the mother of two.
He tells me he’s afraid that if I meet them, our relationship will be over. He keeps saying they are moving back to Bolivia, but they are still here. I also have never met his friends. He says he never does anything with his friends, between his parents living with him and studying for his architectural exams. After all these years, I have yet to meet one of his friends. What should I do? -- OFF THE RADAR IN WISCONSIN DEAR OFF THE RADAR: Recognize that this man may not have been entirely truthful with you about his circumstances. Bluntly put, he may be married, or he may not be who he has represented himself to be in other aspects of his life. Because your relationship hasn’t progressed after four years of dating (off and on), what you should do is move on.
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DEAR ABBY: When a daughter is getting married, how do divorced parents sit, walk down the aisle and conduct themselves? -ALMOST THERE IN NEW YORK
DEAR ALMOST THERE: First and foremost, the divorced parents should act like adults and bury their hostilities (if there are any) on their daughter’s special day. Tact and diplomacy should be paramount. Depending upon the circumstances, the “person of choice” should accompany the bride down the aisle. If there is a stepfather, some brides ask each gentleman to walk halfway down the aisle with her.
If the parents are cordial, Emily Post says they can share the first row. If they aren’t (and I am shortening this), the mother sits in the front row with her relatives behind her. The father and his relatives are seated behind his ex-wife’s family. (If the bride is estranged from her mother, the father and his family occupy the first rows.)