Book offers life lessons to girl from a father fearing death
With his drinking and depression out of control, Rob Seeber feared he would die before he could properly share life lessons with his 4-year-old daughter, Abigail.
So he started writing down things he wanted her to eventually know about love, trust, fear, change, regret, money, nature, sin and other important topics.
Sometimes he did this while downing a bottle of Jack Daniel’s, only to find later that it was barely legible and perhaps too blunt for a young girl. He transferred what was salvageable onto his laptop.
His sense of urgency peaked one night in his truck where he kept a loaded .44.
“I sat there with that revolver in my lap and I couldn’t for the life of me figure out why not to use it. That was rock bottom,” Seeber told me.
That would not be his night to die, and Seeber since has curbed his problem drinking and controlled his depression with medication and through meetings with his pastor that led to a reboot of his religious faith.
But that fear of being absent from his daughter’s life has resulted in a small book, “Abigail’s Psalms,” that pulls together the bits of wit and wisdom and wraps them around many family photos. An employee of Seeber’s who writes fiction helped him with the publishing process.
“My hope is that my daughter will build a strong character during her lifetime. She can’t do it on her own. None of us can or ever have. Along the way the Lord will be the main driving force in and around her, but having a little advice from your dad doesn’t hurt either,” Seeber writes in the book’s introduction.
Abigail is 8 now and in second grade. She has a brother, Owen, 12. The book is aimed at Abigail because Seeber felt he had more time to adequately connect with and instruct his son.
Seeber, 44, lives on a farm in Townsend, which is in Oconto County. He owns a trucking company and has rental units. He and his wife divorced last year, and they share custody of the children.
His plan at first was to print a couple dozen copies of the book for family members. He did that, and set aside a few for Abigail for when she was old enough to understand his advice.
But the book was shared on social media, and he began receiving positive feedback and suggestions that he should market it more widely. That’s what he’s doing now, but it feels like unfamiliar territory.
“It’s just your life, and you don’t think about anybody else really caring about it,” he said. “I’m still trying to get my mind wrapped around what seems to be happening now.”
Here are a few of the nuggets Seeber shares in the book:
“Life will give and take as it does, but it will always be up to you to decide if you are on par with your expectations.”
“Time: Spend some of it on others. When you do waste it, have a hell of a time doing it.”
”Drama: Lose it! (Don’t get caught up in it ... it is not worth it!)”
“Driving: You won’t be near as good at it as you think for a while.”
“Education doesn’t just happen in a school or classroom. Learn about your environment, learn about your history, learn math and learn to communicate, learn to love and if you love to learn your life will be rich in experience.”
It will be awhile before Abigail fully appreciates the words her father has written, but in the meantime “she feels kind of special because none of her friends has a book written for them,” Seeber said.
That’s exciting but also a bit disquieting when you remember that the book was going to stand in for a father who wasn’t around.