TobyMac honors late son at moving Milwaukee show
TobyMac walked onto the stage at the UW-Milwaukee Panther Arena Friday night. There was no band at first. There was no music.
“The last four months of my life have been the hardest and darkest months I’ve ever lived,” the Christian pop star, born Kevin Michael McKeehan, told the hushed, sold-out crowd.
In October, TobyMac’s son, Truett Foster McKeehan, died. He accidentally overdosed on fentanyl and amphetamines, according to autopsy and toxicology reports. He was 21 years old.
“Thank you for your cards, letters, your kind social media posts that have encouraged us, but mostly I want to say thank you for your prayers,” TobyMac continued. “Me and my family are really grateful to you.”
After his opening comments, TobyMac’s band Diversecity took the stage to play the title track of his latest album, 2018’s “The Elements.”
“This world always trying to rip my family apart,” TobyMac rapped from a small stage in the middle of an arena floor, seething. He punched the air one moment, dropped down to his knees the next, as snow started to fall over him.
“I’m gonna go down swingin’, if I’m gonna go down,” he sang on the chorus, again and again, over Tim Rosenau’s ferocious guitar roars.
Unless you’ve experienced loss like TobyMac has, it’s impossible to fathom the pain he’s going through, to completely grasp how difficult it must be to entertain thousands of people night after night while going through such grief.
And yet about a third of the way into the hour-and-40-minute set, TobyMac vowed he and the band were going to give the show everything they had, and he was true to his word.
With brass blaring, TobyMac and Diversecity strutted down the catwalk for the frothy “Elements” track “Everything.” With poignancy and purpose, and even jubilance, he sang about shattering your jaded mindset, of opening your eyes to wonder, for “Edge of Your Seat,” also from “Elements,” one of seven songs in the middle of the set TobyMac and the eight-piece band performed on that small second stage.
Despite his sorrow, TobyMac was eager to please and seemed to take comfort in his fans’ happiness. He fistbumped and high-fived dozens of fans. He posed for selfies, and sang “Happy
Birthday” to a girl celebrating her sweet 16, with some funky backing from the band. For the feel-great, funkpop finale “Feel It,” dozens of fans, mostly teenagers and children, danced with the band on the stage.
And TobyMac processed the loss of his son, and honored his memory, with a song he wrote after his death, “21 Years.”
“Heart shattered in a thousand ways/They tell me pain gonna come in waves,” TobyMac sang. “They tell me I’m gonna be okay/I’m still waitin’ for the first to break.”
“God has you in heaven/But I have you in my heart.”
As the song reached its climax, snippets of black-and-white home movies of Truett as a child flashed on the video panels above the stage. Diversecity’s Gabe Real Patillo looked into TobyMac’s anguished eyes, placed his hand on his shoulder and briefly took the lead on vocals, as “21 Years” segued into a somber, slower rendition of “See The Light.”
It’s also from “Elements,” written before Truett’s death. But it’s a song someone who has lost someone close to them — as its singer now has — could deeply understand.
“Some things will never be the same,” TobyMac sang Friday. “And just the thought of letting go/It’s brought you to your knees.”
“You can make it through the night,” he continued. “You wake up just a little bit stronger. So hold on just a little bit longer.”
“You and me, yeah you and me, we’re gonna see the light.”