LOVE LES­SONS

To find the recipe for a suc­cess­ful mar­riage, we turned to some Mil­wau­kee “ex­perts” with a proven track record.

Milwaukee Weddings - - Content - BY JENNA KASHOU

Sage ad­vice from cou­ples mar­ried for decades.

“Mar­riage is a life­long com­mit­ment and re­quires an at­ti­tude at the deep­est level of your heart that the re­la­tion­ship is for­ever – no mat­ter what. Keep hu­mor at the fore­front of your re­la­tion­ship. Be will­ing to laugh at your­self of­ten. Share the mun­dane things like house­work and meal prepa­ra­tion, and make them fun and en­joy­able.”

Sue and Bob Ki­nosian, mar­ried 45 years

“You are re­spon­si­ble for your own ac­tions and re­sponses, so stay kind and re­spect­ful. Keep grow­ing per­son­ally and bring the best you to the re­la­tion­ship. Mar­riage is not easy, but it’s re­ward­ing. Hang on tight, don’t give up, and en­joy the ride.”

Kris and Tassi De­fe­lice, mar­ried 34 years

“We be­lieve in com­pas­sion­ate un­der­stand­ing. It is not about get­ting what one wants, it’s about find­ing a way for two to be­come one slowly over time – yet at the same time al­low­ing flex­i­bil­ity and un­der­stand­ing of your part­ner’s de­sires and path in life. Com­mit­ment is our foun­da­tion, and our love is built on that – and lots of pa­tience.”

Diane and Mike Dressler, mar­ried 45 years

“There are no good days or bad days, just days of grace. Some­times you have the grace to en­dure the day, and some­times you have the grace to en­joy the day. And God

Lory and Jon Olla, mar­ried 34 years

“Fall­ing in love is mag­i­cal; lov­ing and cre­at­ing a life to­gether is so much more. Dur­ing a rough patch, imag­ine what life would be like with­out your spouse. It puts the lows in per­spec­tive. Also, re­spect your spouse. Don’t let dis­agree­ments turn into op­por­tu­ni­ties to be­lit­tle. Be will­ing to com­pro­mise; re­mem­ber you’re not al­ways right, even when you are. Rem­i­nisce about the good times; it’s your shared his­tory.”

Barb and Ron Mottl, mar­ried 41 years

“Our mantra is ‘Let it go.’ If you can’t fix the prob­lem, ask your­self if it’s worth wor­ry­ing about. Lis­ten and learn from crit­i­cism. Some­times it hurts, but if your part­ner can’t tell you what’s wrong, who can? Open up – don’t in­ter­nal­ize what is both­er­ing you. It al­ways comes out in other ways.”

Beth and Scott Shully, mar­ried 33 years

“Make it through the lows so you can ex­pe­ri­ence the highs, be­cause there are lots of both. Don’t think that the bad times are go­ing to last for­ever. They won’t.” Sue and Har­ri­son Parker, mar­ried 50 years

De­fe­lice Shully gives us grace each day in our re­la­tion­ships, es­pe­cially our mar­riages. There is no magic for­mula, just be­ing will­ing to ad­just.”

Mottl Dressler

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