LOOKING FOR ACCEPTANCE
‘The T Word’ explores issues of transgender youth
Being a teen is tough enough without a gender identity crisis.
Avery Grey — a transgender woman from Long Island City who began identifying as female at 15 — was often discriminated against when she tried applying for jobs or went shopping when she started transitioning.
“It shouldn’t be something big, but it is,” says Grey, now 21. “There wasn’t much representation of trans youth out there. So to know that you can be trans, and still function in society, that would be amazing.”
Grey helps spread that message in the documentary “Laverne Cox Presents: The T Word,” premiering on MTV and Logo TV Friday at 7 p.m. The special follows seven trans youth ages 12 to 24 as they struggle with bullying, dating and anti-transgender violence after coming out to friends and family.
“It’s about adding more voices to the conversation,” says Cox, a transgender activist whose starmaking turn on “Orange Is the New Black” has helped propel the trans movement into the mainstream. She became the first transgender person on the cover of Time magazine last June.
“We wanted to give a more diverse picture of what it’s like for people who are transgender and living their truth,” says Cox, who produced and helped cast the doc. “When we can tell what we’ve been through in a safe space and actually be vulnerable, that’s when you really connect with people. And if we connect with people as people, that’s when social change can begin to happen.”
The special steers away from the technicalities of gender transition and reassignment surgery to instead focus on the young men and women’s relationships with their families, classmates and romantic partners.
“It’s not about what’s in their pants,” says Cox. “It’s about what’s in their hearts and minds. When you get to know these kids, you just have to love them, and you have to empathize with their stories and their struggles.”
Cox was touched by the story of Daniella Carter, 20, from the Bronx, who grew up homeless and in foster care before getting raped last year. The special points out that 41% of transgender people in America attempt suicide due to discrimination, violence and non-acceptance.
“The T Word” shows Carter revisiting the sidewalk where she was attacked. She recalls how emergency responders went from comforting her as a victim, to switching gears and asking whether she was a prostitute after they learned she was transgender.
“It’s essential to give a voice and put a face to the struggle,” says Carter, who will speak at the Time To Thrive Human Rights Campaign in February.“These are the lives you often marginalize,” Carter adds. “But I’m more than my image. I’m a human person who can overcome, and I’m living testament that you can overcome, too.”
The documentary addresses the complications of dating as a transgender male or female, like when Grey tells a guy she’s been speaking to online that she is trans via text message. “Texting is the best way, for safety,” she explains on film. “It’s a very real possibility that we can be harmed physically.”
Her love interest texts back that he’s “not into that,” which Grey says happens a lot.
“Dating can be difficult,” she says, but there’s a silver lining: she’s been seeing someone long distance since the documentary wrapped.
“The T Word” weaves together a diverse, complex tapestry of what the trans experience is like.
“I hope everyone that watches it realizes that everyone is really genuine in this story,” says Grey. “It’s not some kind of reality TV thing.
“We’re normal people, we have feelings, we do normal things, we’re just trying to live our lives like you are. We’re going through the same struggles as you, so, you should probably try to get to know us.”