GOTTA GO TO CATS DELI!
You’re not a real New Yorker if you are hating on a bodega cat. Just ask Gary Mann, who flew home from Miami on Wednesday morning and headed straight to the S.K. Deli on Second Ave. for two New York staples: a bacon, egg and cheese, and a deli cat named Star.
“I see this, and I know I’m home,” said Mann, quickly clarifying that he was talking about the white-pawed kitty even more than the breakfast sandwich.
“A deli cat is a great New York thing,” he said.
Mann didn’t know it, but he went from the friendly skies directly into the maelstrom of the latest battle over New York’s bodega cats. Just hours earlier, an S.K. Deli customer set off a firestorm by complaining about Star on Yelp.
“To my dismay,” the Yelper named Diane D. posted, “there was a cat, perched upon some cases of Budweiser in the middle of the store!!”
First of all, her eyes alighted on the wrong thing: S.K. Deli sells a 12-pack of Bud for $12.99. That’s far more worthy of two exclamation marks than the presence of a cat!!
Predictably, Diane D. was swallowed by a wave of internet attacks (though, oddly, not for needing to consult Yelp to find an East Village bodega).
“You gotta be a miserable gentrifying ass b---h to yelp about the bodega cat,” tweeted @synkami, echoing the persistent refrain of native New Yorkers that newcomers will eventually ruin everything.
In any event, Diane D. promptly deleted her original post. She probably shouldn’t show herself at the deli anymore, either.
Indeed, when I stopped by Wednesday morning, customers were rallying around the newfound celebrity slinking in the aisle near the olives.
“Anyone who doesn’t like a deli cat is not a real New Yorker,” said Michael Sonnenberg, as he ordered a sandwich.
Other customers said they like delis with cats because the presence of the cat tends to reduce the presence of rats. Even dog people think that’s a fair tradeoff.
“I really think it’s odd that people prefer vermin to cats,” added customer Crazy Legs Conti, himself famous for his eating exploits, albeit at Coney Island.
“To me, the New York natural order is humans at the top — some people say dolphins, though I have no use for them — cats, dogs, pigeons, mice and rats,” he added. “Cats and humans have a nice symbiotic relationship.”
Deli owner Byung Seo was unmoved by Diane D.’s complaint.
“Does she want me to throw out my cat?” he asked. “This is a member of my family.”
Seo said he gets a ticket “every year” from the state agency that handles such things, but he doesn’t mind a few hundred dollars in fines because it’s far less than the sullied reputation, pilfered food and even larger fines that rats or mice would invite.
Besides, he added, “My customers love the cat!”
Of course they do. They’re real New Yorkers.