STRAIGHT TALK FOR PARENTS

FEW PEOPLE understand the anguish and agony of parents grappling with a child in the throes of drug addiction better than Alicia Palermo-Reddy.

Over the past eight years, the Staten Island nurse has counseled hundreds of parents struggling to get help for their opioid-addicted children.

Palermo-Reddy has learned some hard truths along the way.

No cases are identical. No solutions are easy.

Though every situation is different, Palermo-Reddy has developed some core pieces of advice for parents seeking help.

Here, in her own words, are Palermo-Reddy’s basic prescriptions for dealing with a loved one who is battling opioid addiction.

These are Palermo-Reddy’s opinions based on her experience with a range of patients but are not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice. Every case is unique and complex and requires individually designed action.

Be proactive

If you know there’s a problem, you must not wait. Waiting will only hurt them. They will get even more sick, or God forbid, you will end up burying them.

The first step is to learn everything there is to learn about addiction and how to be supportive in a productive, positive way.

I hear it all the time — they have to want it. That’s a dangerous notion.

You wait for an addict to have an epiphany and “want it,” they’re going to die in the interim.

Make it difficult for them to use

Don’t give them money to support the habit. It’ll almost definitely go toward drugs.

If you’re employing them or giving them money for nothing, stop.

If you’re paying for their car insurance or allowing them to drive your car, stop.

You must throw a monkey wrench into their routine of coming and going from your home and using as they please.

I would never tell a parent to kick a child out of the home because I don’t know if I could do that myself, but you must exhaust all options.

Prepare for the long haul

Even if your loved one enters rehab, the journey is just beginning.

They cannot just go into detox. They cannot even just do detox and rehab.

Your loved one will need to stay in recovery, working in a program and doing all the steps necessary to completion.

That’s absolutely crucial. There’s no foolproof way to prevent a relapse, but this will give them the best chance at staying sober.

Remain vigilant

Many users suffer relapses after returning from rehab. If you suspect something’s going on, don’t secondguess it. Act.

How? Simple. Drug-test them. Right in your house.

Your son and daughter can lie to you. A drug test will reveal the truth.

It’s black and white, and very simple to take. Make them go in the bathroom and urinate in front of you, so they can’t cheat.

If it comes back positive, then reach out for professional help immediately.

Don’t make the mistake that so many parents make and fall for some crazy excuse. They’ll say, “Oh, it was just a beer or a joint. No big deal.”

Or perhaps: “It’s one slip. I promise that I’ve stopped and will stay clean.”

If you don’t take action, they’ll just fall deeper into their addiction.

Educate early and often

Even if your children aren’t using, you should preach to them about the harmful effects of drugs, including pot and alcohol.

We want to end the epidemic that’s going on now. As far as the addicts go, we can only treat them.

The only way to end the epidemic is by preventing others from starting.