Knowledge
told him — particularly poor Princess Bonapart e, who incidentally, was one of his patients. Also the anonymous — and no doubt, exhausted — winner of the 2009 Danish Masturbate-a-Thon, who reported having a record 222 Big O’s during a single self-pleasuring session. Need additional help to get you going? Well, there was an artificial hormone, Melanotan. Nicknamed “the Barbie drug,” it was originally developed as a self-tanning pill until researchers found out the side effects included decreased appetite and increased desire.
Actually, it sounds more like “the Playmate drug” — you, too, can be thin, tanned and horny — but other, more dangerous side effects drove it off the market. It was never approved for use in the U.S., although word is that Big Pharma went back to the lab to try again.
“The Wonder Down Under” concludes with several more serious chapters on STDs, gynecological problems and pregnancy. Their bullet points?
You should use two forms of birth control, and one needs to be a condom. It’s not the best contraceptive, but it’s the only one that prevents disease.
And infertility is less common than you think, although it becomes increasingly prevalent as women push past 40. Sure, Mick Jagger is still fathering kids in his 70s. “Life is unfair,” the authors note.
Other tips? Peeing after sex is a good way to flush out your urethra, and avoid any pesky infections. Some morning-after pills are available over the counter. The book even provides a website where you can order one online, for $25 postpaid, if you’d like to plan ahead for such emergencies.
And whatever your position about abortion — performed since the beginning of time — outlawing the procedure won’t end it.
Countries where abortions are illegal tend to have more of them, as those nations often also have less access to accurate sex ed.
Which goes to the prime point of “The Wonder Down Under” — knowledge is power. And maybe it starts once we stop being embarrassed.