My wild island excursion
FISHER ISLAND, Fla. — A ride to an NY airport, a plane to Miami, a drive to a dock, a ferry ride and — what one travel magazine recently called — the world’s toprated resort attraction. Nice little place. $250,000, give or take a few bucks, lets you into its exclusivity, which then allows you to be a steady guest or buy permanent or seasonal living quarters (the priciest hovers around an NYC coop), which then assesses you another inch of Cnotes per year, which then permits you to consume its food or whatever.
There are 34 condo buildings, eight houses and even without the roomservice waiters in shorts, it’s earthly heaven. Wandering freely in and out are exquisite creatures, and we are not talking of those types Democratic presidentialee Bernie Socialist calls the 1 Percent.
We’re talking fabulous wildlife. The kind that’s apart from those beauts
Nicki Minaj calls pals. Not possums. Not meerkats. We’re talking peacocks. Flamingos. Parrots. Rare birds. Rabbits. Families of ducks. Guinea hens. Tanned CEOs navigate around these gloriglorious protected creatures,s, who strut about the manicuredicured lawns. Shove paying guests, these have the right of way.way.
Directly outside myy cottage door, right on my step’sep’s welwelcome mat, stood six peacocksacocks clustered together. Staringtaring at me through my windowndow while feasting on flowerswers and grass on whateverver constitutes their lunchnchtime break. They didn’tidn’t move. Cars whizzeded past, people ran by. I stood frozen watchingg them.
Another note: A falconer is employed to keep pesky nonpayingg seabirds from checkingng in.
Plenty of water
THE island’s neighbors also include friendly manatees and a little bit away notsofriendly nurse sharks. It has two private marinas with 118 slips. I mean, minus your own boat here, you’re considered povertystricken. Super spa. Beauty salon. Unspoiled Atlantic Ocean and Biscayne Bay beaches. Three outdoor popools. Golf course. And if you’re scschlepping in on your own helichelicopter, they can handledle that totoo.
NeedsNeed are met
WANT a church service? They got it. A doctor? Cur rently being built is a medical facility. There’s its own fire department. An observatory. A bank. Post office with its own ZIP code.
Fisher Island is six indoor/outdoor restaurants plus a deli. Itching to throw together your own tuna on rye, they got a market. And if you’re hot for the mainland, there’s the ferry back to restaurant Cipriani, which, as always, shows up in more places than Hillary. Fisher Island guarantees ultra privacy with its own gatekeeper, ferry and 600 uniformed security officers.
Courts are held
TENNIS courts? Please. Venus
Williams swatted a few practice sets here before Wimbledon. There are 18 courts — grass, hard and clay. CEO Bernard Lackner, formerly GM of New York’s Hotel Plaza Athénée, might plan a 19th — just for people who can’t play.
There are banquet facilities, 216 acres of lush landscaping, tropical flowers, movie theaters, shopping, hundredyearold trees, fountains, lakes, fish ponds. Dogs are not only welcomed, but given their own dog run.
Food for thought
GOT children? There’s a kiddie playground and a kiddie school. Major sports names are found hanging around. Want a lecture? They just had Alan Dershowitz. For people like me to whom the phrase “Go take a walk” was only used for cheapo boyfriends, there’s your own golf cart to get around. Best of all, the whole place is smokefree. And the grocery has a stack of Lordbepraised New York Posts daily.
IT’S beautiful here. But I’m now flying back to my gritty, noisy, busy, chilly home. I love it. Hey . . . we all have our priorities. Because I live ... only in New York, kids, only in New York.