Gaze into crystal balls
PREDICTIONS: De Blasio: “For safety, I’m putting 20,000 more cops on the street.” Chicago mayor Rahm Emanuel’s should-be prediction: “For safety, I’ll move to Mexico.” Celtic psychic Paula Roberts, my friend: Christine Quinn’s a strong 2018 mayoral contender. A Broadway theater regains glory after f ire damage. Hillary does not fade from public life. (And, advocating change, wears a skirt?) Obama. University lecture tour, then Harvard part-time on international law.
Trump. Fewer speeches than predecessor. Loses weight. USA. No more troops sent abroad. Hawaii. Volcano eruption. Crops, not lives, lost. England. Charles f inally gets Mama’s job. Antarctica. International research station cut off for many months.
John Cohan, who last year predicted Brad and Angelina wouldn’t last — a huge, enormous, mindboggling, large, really big, tall, wide, fat stunning blow of a surprise to us all — now presages:
Anderson Cooper marries partner Benjamin Maisani. Rihanna and Pitt? A decision that’s in the Pitts. Lady Gaga teams with m’lord Harry Connick. Billy Bush: depression, medical help. Oprah goes blond. Like Kim’s hus
band, Kanye (or Kan’t-ye) Worst. Kathie Lee Gifford marries a younger guy. Streisand and husband James Brolin s e para te . This I don’ t bel i eve. I don’ t even t hi nk Brol i n bel i eves . I mean, where’s he goi ng?