Stay in the ‘Sane Lane’
Today’s directors honor yesterday’s
WHEN not pontificating, Bill
O’Reilly scratches out books. The newie, not part of his killing series, is “Old School: Life in the Sane Lane.” This one only kills young smartasses.
A quick read. O’Reilly unleashes his inner snark in just 178 pages.
Stuff like: You’re “Old School” if you: “dress for the airplane; drive a stick shift; close business letters with ‘Sincerely yours.’ ” You’re a “Snowflake” if you: “Wear a tracksuit on the airplane; dream of owning a selfdriving car; sign off with ‘CUL8R.’ ”
O’Reilly divides two teams. Old School versus Snowflake. He pats himself on his wallet, saying he’s “from an old-fashioned working family who knew to value a dollar, show up on time, respect his elders.” His mother’s pot roast “you could cut with a chain saw.” Her Monday pasta? “Brutal red sauce that could remove paint.” The home? “One bathroom unless you count the bushes.”
Old School’s birthday gift to a 4-yearold? “Toys.” Snowflake? “iPhone.” How does Old School communicate? “Face to face.” Snowflake? “Text.” Old School job’s most powerful person? “The CEO.” Snowflake: “Head of human resources.”
He dubs you Snowflake if: Your primary news source is latenight TV comedians . . . If you think some app can solve all your problems . . . If your degree con- tains the words “comparative, ethnic or studies” . . . If less concerned with good grades in college and more interested in posting your list of grievances . . . If you can actually tell all the superhero movies apart. Publisher’s Henry Holt. Price: $27. Fresh from a movie theater’s transgender bathroom yesterday, I picked it up. Nice little read.
FRIDAY, Netflix premieres “Five Came Back,” true story of WWII-era directors Frank Capra, John Ford, John Huston, George Stevens, William Wyler. All of whom left Hollywood to put themselves in harm’s way. To honor this docuseries came a clutch of today’s celebrated directors.
Sneakers, scarf, cashmere coat Steven Spielberg: “I devoured Mark Harris’ original
2014 book about them, which was brilliant. I bought it, and my reaction was to produce this with Barry Diller and Scott
Rudin. I saw this as a documentary.”
George Stevens Jr.: “In the Army, my father was in the Battle of the Bulge. D-Day, he was the f irst person into Dachau. I still have his 35mm black-andwhite footage. The Motion Picture Academy has his papers, but I’ll always keep certain mementos on my desk.” Mexico’s Guillermo del
Toro. “Frank Capra was also an immigrant who fought for his home, not an ideology. This question is very moving to us. If you’re active politically, some will say, ‘Shut up. Talk about your movie.’ Yes, we are artistic animals — but we are also political animals.”
CLIENT: “Was there ever a time this country didn’t have an income tax?”
Accountant: “Yes, it was then called the Garden of Eden.” Only in New York, kids, only in New York.