Weird BUT true

An Ohio criminal’s handwriting was so crappy that the store clerk he was trying to rob couldn’t read his note demanding cash.

The clerk handed the note back to Dion Taylor, 22, and asked him to read it.

“This is a robbery, please be quiet. Don’t let your pride get you killed,” Taylor allegedly read. The clerk handed over cash and a pack of Newports.

Taylor was busted the next day.

Rhode Island is driving motorists to gloominess — they can’t smile for their license pictures any more.

Those getting a new picture taken will be told to make a “neutral” facial expression with a closed mouth.

The change comes as the state overhauls its licenses to comply with federal security standards.

A woman in China who locked herself out of her apartment made things worse by using a rope from a nearby construction site to slide down the outside of the building to her home.

She got stuck on an airconditioning unit and firefighters had to rescue her.

He tried to sober up — with grass.

A drunken driver in China was so sloshed when he rolled his Mercedes up to a police checkpoint, he got out of the car and started scarfing down grass on the side of the road, authorities said.

“I wasn’t drinking! I wasn’t driving!” the man yelled.

It didn’t help. Tests showed his blood-alcohol content was well over the legal limit.

A North Carolina company says bits of golf balls got mixed into its frozen hash-browns after they were “inadvertently harvested” along with potatoes.

McCain Foods is recalling two-pound bags of Harris Teeter Brand Frozen Southern Style Hash Browns and Roundy’s Brand Frozen Southern Style Hash Browns in nine states and Washington, DC.