NOT ON THEIR WATCH
In the new era of nonstop streaming, clashing tastes in TV shows are driving couples apart
S OMETIMES, after a long day at his marketing job, all Peter Moeller wants to do is flop on the couch, uncork a bottle of wine and stream a few episodes of “How It’s Made,” his favorite geeky science series.
That is, if his teacher wife, Christina, hasn’t gotten to the TV first.
“Whenever I come home, she seems to be watching something like [‘Keeping up With] the Kardashians,’ ‘Vanderpump Rules’ or ‘Real World,’ ” says the 33-yearold newlywed, who lives in Red Bank, NJ.
He has no patience for his spouse’s reality-TV addiction — least of all “the Kardashians,” whose drama he likens to a terminal disease.
“It kills me, that whole E! network. I just can’t understand it. It makes no sense to me,” Moeller says. “I don’t care about their problems — it’s brain cancer!”
When he tries to assert himself and change the channel, a spat ensues. “She yells, ‘This is so boring! Turn this off!’ ” Moeller says of his 31-year-old wife. He now refuses to enter the room when she’s immersed in one of her favorite shows.
Whether together or apart, cohabitating couples are watching more TV than ever. The average American now spends almost five hours a day parked in front of the tube, according to Nielsen. Chalk it up to the rise of digital streaming: Deloitte reports that 73 percent of TV viewers engage in binge-watching, defined as sitting through three or more episodes in a row.
It’s hard not to with today’s abundance of addictive programming. In addition to compelling Emmy-winning dramas such as “The Handmaid’s Tale” and “Big Little Lies,” viewers are gorging on cult favorites such as Marvel’s “Luke Cage,” not to mention seemingly infinite episodes of “Real Housewives” and “RuPaul’s Drag Race.”
Which is great — if you and your romantic partner have the same viewing tastes.
Ruth Lapin says it’s downright difficult when preferences don’t align. The 59-year-old event planner says she loves “mindless” entertainment, while her husband, Brent, prefers “weird” cerebral shows such as the revival of “Twin Peaks.”
“One episode was so bad, I just left and went downstairs,” says Lapin, who lives in Boerum Hill. “I just couldn’t stand it. [Brent] got so upset!”
Some people are going to extreme lengths to watch shows away from judgy partners.
“I’ll secretly watch Netflix at work,” says Tabitha Glista, a 32-year-old production manager who lives in Washington Heights with her fiancé, Matt Stewart. He can’t stand Glista’s addiction to soap operas and cookingcompetition shows such as “The Great British Bake Off.”
“It’s just so boring,” says the 26-year-old Stewart, who prefers History Channel documentaries and Netflix’s “Hip-Hop Evolution.” At home, he’ll sometimes watch his favorite shows on a laptop in a room by himself.
Brill Bundy, an entertainment writer in her 40s, says she and her husband enjoy a lot of the same shows, but the differences they do have are sharp.
“He named our kitchen TV ‘Shonda’ after [TV producer] Shonda Rhimes, for ‘all the s - - t you want to watch that I have no interest in,’ ” says the Los Angeles resident. Meanwhile, her husband streams anime on his iPad in bed.
“TV can be a source of real marital strife,” says psychologist Paulette Sherman, author of “Dating From the Inside Out” (Atria Books, out now). “If you are spending time in separate rooms, watching TV three nights a week or more, you may want to examine the toll it’s taking on your relationship. While it’s healthy to have alone time and separate interests, your relationship also requires time.”
Lapin says she’s learning to compromise — and expanding her horizons in the process. She now enjoys some of her husband’s picks, such as “Better Call Saul” and “Stranger Things.”
Her husband is less flexible, but Lapin has made peace with that. “I watched ‘Orange Is the New Black’ with a friend of mine,” she says. “And I watched ‘Suits’ while Brent was traveling. He has absolutely no interest in that.”