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Manziel: Bipolar disorder, alcohol were my downfall
Johnny Manziel now understands his “huge downfall.”
The former first-round draft pick opened up to “Good Morning America” about his battles with alcohol and said he has been diagnosed with bipolar disorder. It’s been two years since the Browns cut the quarterback following a flurry of off-field issues, including substance abuse and allegations of domestic violence.
“I had a sense of entitlement about what I had accomplished at that age,” Manziel said.
A Heisman Trophy winner, Manziel was selected 22nd overall by the Browns in the 2014 draft. The former Texas A&M quarterback struggled on the field, competing with veteran Brian Hoyer at the time for the starting job, and Manziel struggled internally, too.
“I was self-medicating with alcohol. That’s what I thought would make me happy and get out of that depression,” Manziel said. “When I would wake up the next day after a night like that, going on a trip like that, and you wake up the next day and that is all gone, that liquid courage, or that liquid … sense of euphoria that is over you, is all gone.
“You are left staring at the ceiling by yourself, and in that depression and back in that hole, that dark hole of sitting in a room by yourself, super depressed, thinking about all the mistakes you made in your life. What did that get me? Where did that get me except out of the NFL? Where did that get me? Disgraced?”
Manziel is now an outsider looking in, as friends like Odell Beckham Jr. and Mike Evans live out their dreams as the top receivers in the league.
“I am watching all the other guys doing what I want to be doing, and I am sitting on a couch being a loser,” Manziel said.
Diagnosed with bipolar disorder about a year ago, Manziel, who said he no longer drinks, is taking steps to make sure his mental health is in check and remains hopeful for an eventual comeback.
“I am taking medication for bipolar, and I am working to try to make sure I don’t fall back into any type of depression, because I know where that leads me and I know how slippery a slope that is for me,” said Manziel, who is engaged to model Bre Tiesi. “At the end of the day, I can’t help that my wires are a little bit differently crossed than yours. I can’t help my mental makeup or the way that I was created.”
While a return to the NFL remains the ultimate goal, Manziel is aware he has to prove himself to 32 teams in league, assuring them his bounce-back isn’t smoke and mirrors. He was recently in contract negotiations with the Hamilton Tiger-Cats of the CFL.
“I am coming back from a huge downfall,” Manziel said.