Weird BUT true

A mischievous monkey wasn’t a thief — he was just trying to prove he was smarter than the tourist who gawked at him.

The monkey, who lives in a Chinese sanctuary, reached into his victim’s pocket, stole his wallet and looked at what was inside. Then he ran off with the wallet, along the way discarding the money it contained.

Speaking of smart animals: a blind man who is afraid of dogs has become the first person in England to get a trained guide horse.

Mohammed Patel was introduced to Digby — an American Miniature horse — at his home in Lancashire. Digby is still being trained, but eventually will be able not only to guide Patel around town, but even take laundry out of his washing machine.

No ifs or ands — but an awful lot of butts.

Civic-minded Californian Sally Dawly, known fondly as the “Butt Lady of Auburn,’’ picked up her 1 millionth cigarette butt this week.

The non-smoker, armed with a broom and dustpan, has been removing butts for years. She keeps track with a mechanical counter.

A lonely seal looking for love walked onto a British beach on — when else — Valentine’s Day, and planted a kiss on a dog it saw strolling along.

“It was magnificent,’’ said a witness who added that after a farewell nose rub, the nonchalant sea and land creatures went their separate ways.

This baby almost certainly set a record on Instagram — he had 144,000 followers only four days after he was born.

The account for Calihan Gee, whose mother, father and three siblings live in Utah, was set up before he was even born.

His dad, a tech genius, developed an app that he sold to Snapchat for enough money to finance several family trips around the world.