Grey area found in ‘Fiddler’

AMID Tina Fey’s clever new “Mean Girls” and the brilliant “Harry Potter and the Cursed Child” are senior citizens “Carousel,” “Dolly!,” “Phantom,” “Cats,” “Iceman,” “Three Tall Women,” “Chicago.”

Now comes “Fiddler on the Roof.” In Yiddish. The entire production, the total complete whole schmear’s in Yiddish.

Joel Grey is directing. So what’s he know from Yiddish?

“Nothing. I was bar mitzvah’d in Cleveland. An Orthodox temple. Saturdays my dad went to shul. But I don’t know the language. It wasn’t spoken in my house. “The show’s been translated.

Hal Prince, who produced ‘Fiddler’ in ’64, called to suggest me. I thought, interesting. I can’t know each word, but I can be brilliant. Look, I’m a saver. I know the play well. I’ve kept its original program. Love it. Know it by heart. I followed the Yiddish reading with English words in front of me so I know what’s intended.

“We did casting for three weeks. Gentiles who did other shows elsewhere spoke it perfectly. Wanting to work, actors even learn Italian for operas.

We only altered a tiny bit. Like the song ‘If I Were a Rich Man’ comes out as ‘If I Were a Rothschild.’ ”

Grey is celebrating more than 50 years in show business. Museum of Jewish Heritage and National Yiddish Theatre Folksbiene’s ‘Fiddler’ opens July 4.

Going to pot

CYNTHIA Nixon, looking to legalize marijuana in pristine perfect NYC, dredges up this John Waters quote: “An unsavory friend, smoking a pipe, was over my house. It was late. I said, ‘Give me some of that pot.’ I took a big hit. It was crack. I went numb and thought, ‘God! I’m going to be a drug addict. What happens now? Am I going to rob my parents?’ ”

Beware each time you power on

A VIP friend: “Malware captured my computer’s keystrokes, and $300,000 moved from my account to Puerto Rico Banco Popular.

“I learned: 1) Check your accounts daily. 2) Use a Mac, not a PC for Internet transfers. 3) Call the fraud division to report you are unprotected. Money transferred is the bank’s responsibility. Once reported, it’s your problem. In the minutes it takes to close an account and open a new one — if someone transferred more money — the bank, unlike a credit card, is not liable.

“So why didn’t the bank catch it? Three $100K transfers to an unknown operation off the continental US — and they let it go through?!”

This bank is one of NYC’s influential savings institutions.

Senator has Scottish roots

RESPECTS to Sen. John Mc

Cain, who is getting an HBO documentary. Once asked how many houses he has, he didn’t know and replied, “I’ll have my staff get to you.”

Be it known that somewhere in Glasgow, Scotland, exists a threestory brick pile built for the family of his great-great-great-greatgrandpa, the grand laird Joseph McCain. I found this out in London. Even if it misses HBO, may our hero senator lay claim to this historic genealogy.

PER Paul in my building: “Our weather’s behaving. Mother Nature finally beat Old Man Winter.” Only in New York, kids, only in New York.