Weird true BUT

Don’t mess with the manatees.

Luis Tornas Perez, 49, a Florida fisherman, learned that lesson the hard way.

After he slapped the water around a group of 16 mating manatees on Long Key, he was charged with harassment — and hauled off to jail, police said.

It’s illegal to poke, prod, pursue, feed or in any way alter the natural behavior of manatees, police said.

A Vermont man went ballistic on his frequently-chirping kitchen smoke alarm — firing a shotgun at the device to silence it.

But two shots from the 20gauge shotgun, allegedly fired by Leroy Mason, hit the adjoining wall of a neighbor’s apartment.

So police were called and Mason, 68, of Barton, was arrested. Call it a lewd awakening. On a list of “outside toys” that Amazon Prime proposed for a British mom seeking ideas for a 5-yearold’s birthday were a play wheelbarrow set, an alphabet teaching aid — and a giant dildo.

“We did laugh but it was a bit awkward,” Jeni Dobson said of the image of the Xrated “Realistic Silicone Love Wand” that popped up on her screen as she searched with her brother-in-law near her kids.

Play-Doh “fingered” a shoplifting suspect in Massachusetts.

The man successfully used the clay to muffle a Walmart security alarm, but left behind the Play-Doh — which captured his fingerprint perfectly, police in Leicester said.

The print led cops to Dennis Jackson, 55, who was charged with unlawful removal of an anti-theft device.

This “pawofficer” is reporting for duty.

A cat named Badges bested four other Michigan Humane Society tryouts, to win the job with the police department in Troy, Mich.

Badges will be used for therapeutic purposes and will make public appearances.