Weird BUT true

A Canadian company wants to open America’s first sex-robot “brothel” in Texas, but locals say it really pushes their buttons.

Owners of the Torontobased Kinky S Dolls, which offers hourlong “rent-beforeyou-buy” sessions, plan to launch the shop in Houston by the end of the month.

But the high-tech whorehouse is “absolutely horrifying” to neighbors, said Micah Gamboa of the religious group Elijah Rising, which is fighting the plan.

A crook led cops on a highspeed chase, then ditched his car and hid out in a cornfield — only to be foiled by a swarm of mosquitoes.

The unidentified man allegedly swiped booze from a Piggly Wiggly store in Campbellsport, Wis., before making a break for it. Bites from the bloodsuckers got so bad that he surrendered.

Bad news for Jeffrey Dahmer wannabes: Eating human flesh has almost no nutritional value, an awardwinning British study claims.

Cannibalism offers just a fraction of the calories and proteins that Paleolithic-era animals such as deer and mammoth provided, according to research by James Cole of the University of Brighton.

A drunken burglar smashed the window of shop in England with a 4foot giraffe statue — then promptly fell asleep.

Edward Galbraith, 20, allegedly guzzled bottles of wine and beer before swiping $535 worth of clothing from the Two Seasons store in Worcester, then curling up for an ill-timed nap, police said.

A Virginia woman was busted for “fowl” play when she hit a security guard with a fanny pack that inexplicably contained a live pigeon.

Laurie Weave, 56, allegedly flipped out, struck the guard in the noggin and whipped out a knife at the Social Security office in Fairfax.

She was jailed. Her feathered friend was unharmed.