Caddie got more than bargained

I DON’T know if Matt Kuchar is a tightwad or if he makes with phony smiles for the cameras and crowds, as he has lately been portrayed. But I do know that most stories have multiple sides.

It has been reported

the local caddie, David Giral Ortiz, who looped for Kuchar in Mexico last month agreed to payment terms before the PGA tournament in which Kuchar won the $1.29 million first prize.

Kuchar then paid him the agreed fees for the week — $2,000 if he made the cut, $3,000 if he finished top-20, $4,000 if he made the top 10. He then threw in an extra grand for a total payment of $5,000. Yes, a pittance by regular PGA caddie standards but better than their original agreement.

Kuchar relented Friday, succumbing to public backlash, making Ortiz whole with a total payments of $50,000.

Had Kuchar finished 72nd — the last paying spot — his caddie would have been paid $2,000 from Kuchar’s $14,000 — 14 percent rather than the customary 5 percent — and presumably would have left pleased with the math and his good fortune.

Time for a new format for the NBA All-Star Game: the publicly very unhappy multimillionaire stars — Team Trade Me — vs. the publicly just unhappy multimillionaire stars — Team Twitter.

At halftime, Pin The Tail On The Donkey for those coaches imperiled or dismissed as per the wishes of unhappy AllStars.