HEAVEN SENT
With the latest ‘Charlie’s Angels’ trio now in theaters, we rank all the butt-kicking, crimefighting beauties from the past 4 decades
HELLO, Angels!
If we’re being honest, we had no idea there were so darn many of you. Since its debut on television in 1976, “Charlie’s Angels” has proven to be among pop culture’s most durable franchises, spawning two McG-directed films in the aughts and a 2011 TV series reboot.
The latest iteration hits theaters Friday and is simply called “Charlie’s Angels.” It introduces a new set of skilled private detectives — played by Kristen Stewart, Naomi Scott and Ella Balinska — who this time are tasked by their boss Bosley (Elizabeth Banks in a gender switch-up) to keep dangerous tech out of the wrong hands.
So how does the new cast stack up? Here’s a ranking of every major Angel — from Earthbound to simply heavenly.
Shelley Hack
WHO: Tiffany Welles, who joined the original series in Season 4 REIGN: 1979-1980
ANGELIC RELEVANCY: Her first appearance was on “The Love Boat” crossover episode, and it got worse from there. Producers found her acting so stiff that they were forced to cut her lines, often leaving her with little more than a handful in an episode.
Nadine Velazquez
WHO: Gloria Martinez, an explosives expert in the 2011 TV series REIGN: 2011 ANGELIC RELEVANCY:
The rebooted TV series only lasted eight episodes. And she dies in the first one.
Rachael Taylor
WHO: Abby Sampson, a former thief in the 2011 TV series REIGN: 2011 ANGELIC RELEVANCY:
Like viewers, Taylor seemingly had little respect for this quickly canceled series, admitting she never bothered to watch the original “Angels.”
Tanya Roberts
WHO: Julie Rogers, a former model who joined in Season 5 REIGN: 1980-1981 ANGELIC RELEVANCY:
The last in a line of Angel replacements required as the original stars bolted, Roberts arrived in the final season, just as the show’s ratings were in the toilet. She did get to film an episode in Hawaii, though.
Minka Kelly
WHO: Eve French, a street racer in the 2011 TV series REIGN: 2011 ANGELIC RELEVANCY:
She went from the truly great “Friday Night Lights” . . . to this. At least she’s back harming baddies as a superhero in “Titans.”
Annie Ilonzeh
WHO: Kate Prince, a former cop in the 2011 TV series REIGN: 2011
ANGELIC RELEVANCY: Did make a mark by being the first African-American Angel.
Lucy Liu
WHO: Alex Munday, a wealthy genius in the first films REIGN: 2000-2003 ANGELIC RELEVANCY:
She’s a badass who’s kicked butt on-screen in “Kill Bill: Vol. 1,” among others. But it was her behind-the-scenes fight with Bill Murray on the set of “Charlie’s Angels” that reportedly made him not return for the sequel.
Naomi Scott
WHO: Elena Houghlin, a
scientist in the new movie REIGN: 2019-? ANGELIC RELEVANCY:
She got noticed by director Elizabeth Banks after appearing as the Pink Ranger in 2017’s “Power Rangers.” Now she jokes that, as halfBritish, half-Ugandan, she’s getting calls for all of Hollywood’s “woke” reboots.
Ella Balinska
WHO: Jane Kano, a former MI6 agent in the new movie REIGN: 2019-? ANGELIC RELEVANCY:
She worked in the shoe department of a British store before hitting it big in this film. Loves stage-fighting and does some of her own stunts, which could mean plenty of work ahead.
Cameron Diaz
WHO: Natalie Cook, the leader of the Angels in the films “Charlie’s Angels” and “Charlie’s Angels: Full Throttle.”
REIGN: 2000-2003 ANGELIC RELEVANCY:
Despite all the ass-kicking the Angels do (for which they trained eight hours a day), it was arguably Diaz’s carefree dance scenes that stole the show and spawned a thousand GIFs. “She’s not thinking if I look good,” the choreographers said.
Kristen Stewart
WHO: Sabina Wilson, a
party-girl Angel from the new film
REIGN: 2019-? ANGELIC RELEVANCY:
Reviews suggest Stewart’s Angel is the most memorable of the new batch. Banks has also confirmed that the character is gay.
Cheryl Ladd
WHO: Kris Munroe, the sis
ter of Farrah Fawcett’s character, who debuted in Season 2
REIGN: 1977-1981 ANGELIC RELEVANCY:
Ladd had to do the impossible: take over for original Angel and superstar Fawcett, who stepped back from the series due to the exhausting schedule. Despite the swap, the show’s ratings stayed high.
Jaclyn Smith
WHO: Kelly Garrett, one of the original Angels REIGN: 1976-1981 ANGELIC RELEVANCY:
Producers nearly passed on the actress because they were in search of a redhead, but she landed the part, becoming the only actress to appear in every season of the original TV series, as well as 2003’s “Full Throttle” and the new film.
Drew Barrymore
WHO: Dylan Sanders, an Angel with a rebellious streak from the films REIGN: 2000-2003 ANGELIC RELEVANCY:
She starred in the films, and served as producer, helping to bring the franchise back into the spotlight — and reportedly earned a hefty $80 million.
Kate Jackson
WHO: Sabrina Duncan, one of the original Angels REIGN: 1976-1979 ANGELIC RELEVANCY:
The show was initially called “The Alley Cats” until Jackson, discussing the project with producer Aaron Spelling, suggested the name “Angels.” She also came up with the idea that Charlie would be a disembodied voice from a speakerphone and that the ladies would work as private detectives. Jackson was the only Angel nominated for an Emmy.