Angie’s used to putting out fires
ANGELINA Jolie is now playing a survival expert.
A Montana smokejumper. The state’s big with trees — firs, cedars, spruce, hemlock. The movie is “Those Who Wish Me Dead,” a neo-Western action thriller whatever. Bad guys chase a teen boy, and there’s a big fire and St. Angie rushes to his aid and blaah blaah.
Also there’s bad language plus this nice kid fights for his life plus mother mercy angel Ange — whom we’ve recently seen in fashion magazines — this is after divorcing Jonny Lee Miller, Billy Bob Thornton and Brad Pitt — is now risking life and shapely limb — also critics — to rush, speed, careen to save the kid.
But calm yourselves. Relax your bones. We need wait for this until middle May.
Another winner. On Amazon the 30th comes “Tom Clancy’s Without Remorse.” Michael B. Jordan plays an ex-Navy SEAL panting for revenge after his pregnant wife’s killed. We’re talking burning cars, buildings, underwater drama.
Jordan: “It’s choreography. Like, I learned to do the cha-cha while making ‘Creed’ and ‘Creed II.’ I’m a visual learner. An adrenaline junkie. Once I practice the moves like a dance, they burn into my brain. That’s how I approached the fights in ‘Black Panther.’
“Shooting out of order, it’s tough to remember how hurt you’re supposed to be at any moment in the movie. But how often’s anyone get a chance to walk into a burning car or survive a plane crash? I love doing it!” Right. Especially since he’s the thing’s co-producer.
Born to kill
ALSO: Sir Anthony Hopkins. Oscar-nominated for playing someone with dementia in “The Father.” Now another happy uplifting role as a hit man in Lionsgate’s “The Virtuoso.” Hopkins: “I play the Mentor. Talks tough, but deep down inside he died many years ago. This guy was like a real person I knew. This person had killed someone and then himself just died inside. That choice is what you have to do if you want to live. I’d asked him, ‘You ever forget it?’ He said, ‘No. And I never will.’
We human beings are homicidal killers by nature. Military training and duty and all that might be just finishing school.”
This springtime charmer blooms April 30.
Also now upon us is action comedy “Thunder Force.” It has super names. Also super strength.
Melissa McCarthy: “I’m ‘bionically’ strong in it. Punching someone means they fly across the room. I hadn’t done this kind of wire stuff and spinning and in a harness flipping around before. I was so dizzy I didn’t even know I was falling. It took getting used to.”
Octavia Spencer’s role makes her invisible, and another Melissa — Leo — plays an ex-CIA agent.
If you can figure this thing out it’s on Netflix.
Whatever happened to moon/ June/spoon? Happy movies. Nice stories. Like in the style of Ingrid Bergman/Humphrey Bogart/Peter Lorre’s “Casablanca”? Like maybe another “Breakfast at Tiffany’s” with Audrey Hepburn/ Patricia Neal/George Peppard type heartwarmer? Or that “Roman Holiday” blockbuster with Gregory Peck? Must everything today be a shoot ’em/kill ’em/ death-to-all downer?
BIDEN’s tumbling. His son Hunter’s grumbling. His wife’s fumbling. Jill, a senior, was flashing patterned crocheted busy black stockings, plus jazzy ankle boots, plus a short leather skirt? To match her long straggly bleached yellow hair? Ever see that on Nancy Reagan? Jackie Kennedy? Melania Trump? Can’t someone get her a stylist? The great glorious Godblessus United States of America has the Clampetts in the White House!
Criticized loudly in New York, kids, loudly in New York.